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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27400660">In the Island’s bluest eyes</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/RumpyKamon/pseuds/RumpyKamon'>RumpyKamon</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Lost</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Might go very kinky, Slow Burn, request</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-05-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 21:01:20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>22,628</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27400660</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/RumpyKamon/pseuds/RumpyKamon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>ReaderxBen: You arrive on the island after being contacted by Richard. He says it is to help saving your baby. That is originally Ben’s plan but everything changes as soon as he meets you...</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ben Linus/Reader, Benjamin Linus/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>52</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. The arrival</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/drbenlinus/gifts">drbenlinus</a>.</li>



    </ul></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“What do you mean you can’t berth?”<br/>
“We have a problem with the sonar.”<br/>
“The sonar? Richard, you’re talking to me right now!”<br/>
“I know Ben, calm down, we had a problem when we arrived, we hit some cable and it caused an electrical short circuit and now we’re stopped.”<br/>
“You mean that the submarine can’t move ?”<br/>
“That’s exactly what I mean, Ben.”<br/>
“Ok, where are you now ?”<br/>
“We’re offshore of the fake village.”<br/>
“Are you at the surface ?”<br/>
“Yes.”<br/>
“Good. Stay there, I’m coming with Goodwin.”</p><p>The radio stopped. You still felt groggy after the sleeping pill and your head was hurting a bit. You saw Richard coming to you and smiling softly. </p><p>“Hey, welcome to the island [Y/N]. “<br/>
“Are we there?”<br/>
“Nearly. We’re up to the surface, a boat is coming to get us. It’s ok, don’t worry. You will feel a bit dizzy for a few hours then it will all be fine.” He gave you a glass of orange juice. You took it and drunk a little while sitting up. “Do you feel any different from your time on the continent ?”<br/>
“Not really...” you placed a hand on your belly. Richard looked down at your belly then up at you.<br/>
“It’s going to be ok. We will save your baby.” And with these last words, he got on his feet and out of the small room. </p><p>He walked up to the machines and talked a little with the driver then climbed the ladder up to the fresh air. He watched around him. The island was about half a mile away. He stood low to make sure that there was no danger around. That’s when the radio bipped again. He grabbed it and answered. </p><p>“Richard here.”<br/>
“We’re in the boat, give me exactly your localisation.”<br/>
“[undisclosed location].”<br/>
“Ok. We’ll be here in fifteen minutes, try not to die until then.”</p><p>And the radio went off again. Richard sunk back in the submarine and joined the driver. They talked low when you finally emerged from your bed, holding on a feet then the other, feeling the submarine slowly balancing with the waves. You held the ladder and breathed slowly. Richard smiled at you and turned around to grab your suitcase. </p><p>“The boat will be here soon. You can get up there if you want to take some fresh air.”<br/>
“Sure, I would love that.”</p><p>He smiled and helped you up. As soon as you pushed the door open, a thing sparkled near your eye with a metallic sound. Richard pulled you back down and grabbed a gun he had hidden under his vest. </p><p>“What’s happening? Why do you have a gun?”<br/>
“Stay here.” He climbed up and nearly opened the door. He moved his hand in the slit and shot two times. “We’re staying in until Ben gets here.”<br/>
Radio.<br/>
“Richard? Richard can you hear me ?”<br/>
“Yes Ben, I’m here. We’ve just been shot.”<br/>
“It must be Danielle. I suspected that when you talked about a cable. It’s ok keep [Y/N] safe, we’re almost here.”</p><p>The few minutes you had to wait felt like an eternity and you didn’t dare moving anymore. Richard was silent, standing with his gun in his hand. Two metallic sound resounded on the top of the door. Richard responded. That’s when the door opened on a tall blond haired man. </p><p>“Are you ok in there ?”<br/>
“Yes, thank you Goodwin.” Goodwin jumped down in the submarine and joined the machinist. He looked closely at the machines and sighed.<br/>
“I see... I’ll stay here and try to fix the submarine. Ben is waiting for you.”<br/>
“Alright.” Richard turned to you. “Come now [Y/N], we’ll take you to safety.”</p><p>He took your suitcase and helped you up. A hand took yours as you got out. A firm yet gentle hand which pulled you out, to him. Benjamin Linus. You didn’t know his name, nor his face, nor how important he would soon be to you. But you were sure of one thing: you never felt more safe than right now while he was holding your hand. </p><p>“Hello. Welcome to the Island. I’m Ben. I hope you enjoyed your trip except for this incident.”<br/>
“It, it was ok.”<br/>
“Don’t worry. You have nothing to fear from us.”</p><p>You smiled softly and jumped in the boat by his side, soon joined by Richard. The two men looked at each other. Richard kept a straight face while Ben smiled at him. He got back at the rudder and sailed away. Richard helped you sit near Ben. He started to talk to you. </p><p>“I’m sure we will get the chance to learn to know each other better but, for now you should rest. I will show you to your house, we tried to decorate it as you’d like but you can add as many things as you want. Our village is very well organised and I will give you a small tour. You also need to know that we have a barrier symbolised by very large columns, this is to defend ourselves from the unpredictable nature and, well, some natives that you unfortunately met. But let’s stop with boring details, you will see everything by yourself, it will be much more interesting. Be assured that Jacob is proud to have you by his side.”</p><p>Richard kept silent. And so did Ben. </p><p>You soon arrived at the pier. You waited until the boat parked on the pier and got up. Ben walked first and Richard stood by your side with your suitcase. You walked for a few minutes and entered the village, a nice suburban looking village with small houses. Everybody seemed happy, with big smiles, clean clothes and the full greeting package. Though a few looked at you and Ben with a strange attention. Ben was still walking head first and stopped on the porch of a small house. He opened the door and walked in. </p><p>“Welcome home.” Ben said as he turned to you. “You have everything that you could need but if you have any request, you can ask at the central office, the big wooden built we passed when we arrived. My house is there. “He pointed at a bigger house. Then turned to you and nodded. “I need to go now. Make yourself at home.”</p><p>And with these last words he left. Richard smiled softly then left as well. </p><p>This was so different from the walls you used to know. Even the air tasted different. This island definitely was a very strange place. But Ben looked nice and gentle and Richard helped you. You would need time, but eventually, this would be your home. </p><p>___</p><p>Out of the house Ben was arguing with Richard, yet keeping a straight face. </p><p>“Would you care explaining how did that happen ? How did you end up in a cable ?”<br/>
“I don’t know Ben.”<br/>
“Well you should know! Imagine if anything had happened to [Y/N]. We need her alive Richard.”<br/>
“She’s here now Ben. You don’t need to worry.”<br/>
“I will stop worrying when this problem will be solved. Now get the submarine back here.”</p><p>And with these last words he left. Richard walked back to the boat, and Ben back to his office, but as soon as he walked in, his radio bipped again...</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. The Doctor</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I had so many stuff to add to this chapter but I want them to be detailed AND short enough for an easy reading. Let me know what you think of it and if there’s anything you’d like me to add ^^</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ben grabbed his radio and answered. </p><p>“ Ben here. “<br/>
“ Ben, there’s a problem with the submarine. It’s taken in the cable linked to The Mirror. “<br/>
“ Did you call Bonnie ? “<br/>
“ Yes, she said she didn’t have any problem with the station. “<br/>
“ Then how did the submarine get in that ? It can’t possibly be Danielle. “<br/>
“ I don’t know, we have to dive to get the cable out. And we might have to cut the current. “<br/>
“ No, Goodwin, you can’t do that. “<br/>
“ We have no choice. “<br/>
“ I’m not giving you a choice. You’ll free the submarine without putting the mirror out. “</p><p>Ben turned the radio off. He bit his lower lip nervously then looked down and thought for a second of how much of a strange situation this was. Why would the Island trap the submarine? Why now? Why did It want to keep you off it ? He couldn’t find any answer to these questions and sighed softly. He better liked you in this small house rather than trapped under the sea, especially now that he had let you. He smiled softly thinking about your face and the warm feeling that filled him when he held your hand right there for the first time. But then he shook his head and stopped say dreaming. He brought you here for a reason. So, he joined Ethan. He walked to the main office where Ethan was drinking some coffee, waiting for Ben. He stood near him and looked down at the coffee mug then back up at Ethan. </p><p>“ Did you find [Y/N]’s file ? “<br/>
“ Yes. From what I read, the baby has stopped moving a few weeks ago. The doctor says that it’s still alive but a baby this big not moving for weeks... I don’t know if we’ll be able to save it. “<br/>
“ Aren’t you trusting the Island ? “<br/>
“ The Island doesn’t want her here. That’s why there was an incident with the submarine. “<br/>
Ben starred at him. Now that you weren’t here, he didn’t have to take a smile like he did for Richard. His piercing blue eyes slipped into Ethan down to his soul. Oh yes he was angry. But silent... this was easily Ben’s scariest face.<br/>
“ Is there anything you need, Ethan ? “ he said of a calm voice.<br/>
“ Yes, Ben. An actual obstetrician. I’m not a midwife. “<br/>
“ I know. But Jacob hasn’t find anyone good enough yet. “ he answered very calmly. Ethan looked down at his coffee and dared asking:<br/>
“ Why did Jacob chose [Y/N] ? “<br/>
“ He has his reasons Ethan. Reasons I can’t tell you about. But the Island wanted her here. So, do your job, and Jacob will do the rest. “</p><p>Ben turned on his heels, determined, straight up, out of the office, back to his house. </p><p>As for you, you were putting your clothes up in your wardrobe and explored the house. It wasn’t a big house, a bedroom, a bathroom, a kitchen and a large living room. It was big enough for you, for now. Though you wondered if the baby would be born, where you would put it? Where you would raise it? You were lucky enough to have this baby in you, you battled for a long time to be pregnant, because you were a single mom. But here you were, carrying this tiny being in your belly. Though your stomach was just as big as those days you abused of a good restaurant, you still felt a huge difference of sensations between the two. Unfortunately, a few weeks ago, you fell in the staircase in your flat. You rushed immediately to the doctor and asked if the baby was ok, and according to the doctor you had no problem, the baby still was tied to you. But the baby stopped moving and you knew there was something wrong...</p><p>So when Richard showed up to your doorstep with his fancy suit and pretty face, offering you to come to this Island, that was a so called miraculous place where doctors worked on fertility issues, you accepted right away. You couldn’t take any chance with this, it was too important... Now that you were there, it felt strange but, Ben’s presence was really reassuring. Though you spent only an hour or two by his side, his calm was comforting, he was a really special man. You never felt like that with a man before. And it wasn’t unpleasant after all... You realised the silly smile that was on your face while sitting on the couch and got up. Tomorrow would be a big day. </p><p>And it was indeed a big day. First, Ben came to your house quite early, he told you to get dressed very simply and that you couldn’t eat just yet because you would run blood tests for the baby. Before you managed to speak, he smiles softly and said he would invite you over for the breakfast at his place after that, or rather, a brunch because the morning would turn into noon and after noon. You dressed up quickly with a white dress and pulled your hair back then joined Ben. He took you through the village, it was quiet, most of the habitants were still sleeping. Ben hopped down in the same boat as he took you in the day before and a chubby man with white hair joined you. Ben introduced you to Tomb and then lead the boat elsewhere. </p><p>“ I didn’t know the Island had other islands around it. “<br/>
“ That’s where we have the best analyses equipment. After that, I will take you to a station in the jungle where we have a maternity. “<br/>
“ A maternity ? Here ? Waw... this Island really is full of surprises. “<br/>
“ You haven’t seen a fifth of it. “ Ben smiled as he watched you. </p><p>You arrived on the Island fourth five minutes later. You got down from the boat then up in a golf car to a center -and noticed that there were some men with machine guns but, time wasn’t to Q&amp;A so you stood silent- Ben pulled over in front of a big place with an octagon on its door, the same logo you saw on your cereals and stuff. Well not exactly, the drawing here was different. But then again, it wasn’t the time for questions. You followed Ben through the corridors and finally ended up in a large room that looked like an observation room. You two stood alone for a few minutes then a tall guys with dark hair walked in. </p><p>“ Hello [Y/N] I’m Ethan. I’m the surgeon on the Island. Nice to meet you. “<br/>
“ Nice to meet you too. “<br/>
“ Well, I’ve read your file and I’m really curious about your case, of course you don’t need to worry, if you got in the Island, it means that now you’re in good hands. “ he quickly look at Ben then back at you. “ I’m gonna take some blood from you and run a few tests, so I have fresher results from last time. Then we will proceed to the ultrasound. “<br/>
“ At the Staff. “<br/>
“ Yes. But I’m sure [Y/N] will need a break between the two exams. “<br/>
“ Sure, Ethan. You’re the doctor. “</p><p>You kept silent but listened carefully to what was said and you slowly started to understand that Ben was a very strong leader. Polite and silent but he definitely knew what he wanted. So you sat on the operation table and waited for Ethan to sample your blood and leave the room to run the tests. </p><p>“ About that breakfast... “ silence. Ben looked at you.<br/>
“ I can assure you that we have all the food you need, [Y/N]. You can ask me for anything. “<br/>
“ Really ? Oh... hum... what would you advise me to eat ? “<br/>
“ Since you’re pregnant, it would be good for you to eat some fruits and any food that can provide vitamins. But also glucide and... maybe toasts with jam would be a good guess. What do say ? “<br/>
“ Sure. Sure. Jam.... what kind of jam do you have ? “<br/>
“ Let me think... “ He stood up and went silent for a few seconds then started nodding. “ Cherry, apricot, strawberry, raspberry, rhubarb, quince, peach and blackberry. “<br/>
“ Wh- all that ? “<br/>
“ Yes. I told you. We have everything you need here. “<br/>
You smiled softly and heard a door opening, Ethan was coming back. With papers in his hands.<br/>
“ Alright, we’ll have the results in the afternoon. You should eat something and then we’ll meet at The Staff in a few hours. “</p><p>He nodded at Ben then left. The blue eyed man turned to you and helped you down to your feet and walked you back to the car, to the boat, to the main island, to his house. </p><p>“ So. Strawberry jam toasts ?</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. The Tea Party</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>At the end of the week, you knew everything about the village. You had visited the buildings like the library, the infirmary and so on, and you also met a lot of habitants. Some had brought you pastries as greeting gift. Others had invited you over for lunch or dinner. You obeyed Ben’s advice and didn’t go far away from the village, actually, you never ventured to the ‘columns’ that limited the village’s borders. All in all it was a good time and you soon felt home. The last time you saw Ben -which was three days ago because he was a very busy man- he invited you to his place: Sunday, 4pm. You were excited to discover his house but yet felt a strange ache in your belly, that wasn’t caused by the baby. You smiled softly, wondering why you were growing anxious to go to his place, after all, you liked Ben. </p>
<p>You got prepared in nice clothes, not too elegant, not too simple, something that represented you. You grabbed a bottle of wine you had received from one habitant and headed to Ben’s place. You knocked on the door at 4pm sharp. Ben showed up and opened the door with a soft smile and invited you to come in. You noticed that his house was different from yours, it was bigger. Yet you couldn’t see the difference by just looking at his living room. You didn’t care much about the house, you noticed large piles of books on his desk, and sat on a chair near the kitchen table. You gave Ben the bottle and he thanked you of a movement of head. He stored it away and joined you with tea, coffee and biscuits. He sat down and looked at his desk then back at you. </p>
<p>“ How was your first week among us, [Y/N] ?”<br/>“ Good. I wasn’t sure what to expect, but I feel like I belong here. “ Ben smiled as he heard this. <br/>“ I knew you would make yourself at home eventually. “ he got up and poured some tea in your cup. “ And I can tell Jacob is glad to have you with us. “<br/>“ Will I meet him ? “<br/>“ No. I’m sorry but Jacob is really busy and he only talks with me. “<br/>“ I see... “<br/>“ Taking care of the Island is very demanding. I know that well. Taking care of this tribe is quite a heavy task on its own. But once in a while, I have some good surprises. “ he smiled at you. You felt yourself blushing and quickly moved the cup to your lips to hide it. <br/>“ Why are you working on fertility especially on the Island ? “<br/>“ We’re not working only on that. The Island is a very special place... if she decides to help you, then you will be saved. “<br/>“ Saved ? “<br/>“ Cured. Your baby will be delivered and you would be safe. “<br/>“ You don’t sound so sure about that, Ben. “<br/>“ I am sure that I can help you. But I need to know that you trust me. Do you trust me [Y/N] ? “<br/>“ Of course I do. “<br/>“ Then there’s nothing to fear. But let’s talk a bit about you. Except from your file, I know nothing of you. “</p>
<p>You spent half an hour explaining stuff about you, your home, your family, your boyfriend who left when you got pregnant... Ben seemed really interested in you. He nodded through the whole discussion, not asking things yet. You were flattered by his interest in you. Sure, he was the charismatic leader of this tribe, but he was also a confidant, someone you could rely on. Yes. You liked him. </p>
<p>____ </p>
<p>Ben was watching you attentively, each things you were telling him he knew about already, after all, he was Benjamin Linus, he knew everything about everyone. But he wanted to know if you trusted him, and with you confessing to him so, he understood that he had your entire trust. He simply nodded to you, he knew he would have to wait some more before asking any questions; he didn’t have much things to ask from you, but he knew how much you wanted him to be interested in you. So, he took his time and watched your lips carefully, until he was sure your lips were burning with a desire to answer his most sensitive questions. And since Ben always knew what you were thinking before you even thought it, he always was one step ahead, he already had a few questions ready for you. He was just waiting for the good moment. Always waiting. Always patient. </p>
<p>He detailed your face with his eyes, looking at your cheekbones, your eyes, your smile, the delicate red running on your cheeks as you smiled, your hair, the little wrinkles forming at the corner of your eyes when you looked up. He painted your face in his mind, saving it for his daydreaming. He had worked so hard to have you on this Island, that he was finally rewarded for his patience. Of course, there were thousands of women pregnant around the world. But he wanted You. You weren’t like all the others. You were special. You belonged on this Island. By his side. </p>
<p>He kept staring at you until he opened his mouth to ask his first question but as soon as he parted his lips, Alex walked in. He turned his head and saw her. You turned to her as well and wondered who she was. </p>
<p>“ [Y/N], let me introduce you Alex. She’s my daughter. “<br/>“ Your... daughter ? I didn’t know you had children. “<br/>“ Am I interrupting something? “ she asked if a calm voice. <br/>“ Not at all. “ you answered and smiled softly. She grabbed something on the counter and turned to Ben. <br/>“ See you later. Dad. “ and she left. Ben turned to you and kept silent, pressing his lips together. <br/>“ Are you ok ? Do you want me to come back later ? “<br/>“ No. Of course not. I’m glad you met my daughter. “ you nodded slowly and grabbed a biscuit. <br/>“ She’s pretty. “<br/>“ Yes she is. “<br/>“ And... her mother ? “<br/>“ Dead. “<br/>“ I’m sorry, I didn’t know... “<br/>“ It’s ok. She’s long gone now. She died giving birth to Alex... But, we were talking about you [Y/N]. Have you decided of a name for your baby ? “<br/>“ I, I don’t know hum... I don’t even know yet if it’s going to be a boy or a girl. “</p>
<p> </p>
<p>____</p>
<p>You were confused, you were miles away from imagining Ben with a daughter. Ben as a widower. You felt sorry for him and yet curious. He seemed so fragile all of a sudden and you felt a urge to hug him, but you couldn’t, it would seem weird or inappropriate; yet looking at Ben like that you felt your heart tightening. You stopped talking and simply put your hand over his and held it. He looked down at your hand and squeezed it while watching back at you. </p>
<p>“ Is something wrong [Y/N] ? “<br/>“ No... No it’s all right. “</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. The kiss</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You stopped talking and simply put your hand over his and held it. He looked down at your hand and squeezed it while watching back at you.<br/>“ Is something wrong [Y/N] ? “<br/>“ No... No it’s all right. “</p>
<p>You leaned slowly towards Ben and looked down. He moved a hand up to your face and gently caresses your cheek. It was your turn to feel weak. You looked up at him, into his blue eyes and lost yourself in them. There was a sincerity in his stare that you couldn’t quite understand. You felt your lower lip twitching and whispered. </p>
<p>“ I’m sorry Ben... “<br/>“ Sorry ? Why ? “<br/>“ I had no idea... about... “<br/>He shook his head softly. <br/>“ [Y/N], don’t be sorry. I’m happy here. On this Island. With my daughter. That’s all that matters. “ A tear rolled down your eyes and he wiped it with his thumb. “ Don’t cry, please. “</p>
<p>You nodded and looked back down. You kept his hand pressed against your cheek and closed your eyes. You let yourself lean on him a bit more until your head rested on his shoulder. You felt him almost startled with this physical contact. </p>
<p>“ The hormones must be kicking hard... “<br/>“ This is a good sign. It means that your baby is still alive. “</p>
<p>You giggled and moved your arms to hug him. He responded by hugging you back, his firm hands set on your back. </p>
<p>“ I feel like I could trust you with anything. “<br/>“ Because you do. You can rely on me for anything. “<br/>“ Why do I feel like I belong here...? “<br/>“ The Island brought you here- “<br/>“ No I mean, in your arms. “</p>
<p>He stood silent for a few seconds, pulled back and cupped your face. </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p>He couldn’t believe how easy it had been for him to be loved by you. Oh sure the hormones were involved, but then, feelings... and to be fair he didn’t expect himself to fall in love so easily either. Alex’s intervention was a blessing in disguise. It had brought you some more sympathy for him. Now it was time for him to manage his way beyond friendship and trust. </p>
<p>But Ben had lost contact with flesh for so long... he felt his heart almost stopping when you leaned on him, a gesture of pure love... how could he respond. He was there, cupping your face, looking at you, but was too scared to do anything, try anything that you wouldn’t want, but it was his chance, he couldn’t let it escape. </p>
<p>His plans were going a bit too well. </p>
<p>But you made the first move, he didn’t even understand what was happening until you pulled back. That’s when his lips suddenly felt dry and his skin hot. You just kissed him. His face was petrified as if he had seen a ghost. </p>
<p>A kiss. </p>
<p>But how...</p>
<p>He felt you pulling back from his hands but dragged you to him, closed his eyes and kissed you, encapsulating your lips with his. A tender and chaste kiss, just enough time for both of you to enjoy your face sealed in this loving act. </p>
<p>And a few seconds later, your lips parted. </p>
<p>He sat back on his chair, straight, not blinking, almost as if nothing of that happened. </p>
<p>_____</p>
<p>You were confused. Did you do something wrong ? Why did he pull back ? Why was he looking at you like that ? A hundred questions ran through your mind and your heart pounded. You were so happy, so happy to have finally kissed him, put a name on the feelings you had, and yet here was he, standing still, cold. You caught your breath and opened your mouth to talk but he raised his hand and shook his head. </p>
<p>“ Let’s not waste this moment with words, shall we ? “</p>
<p>That... that meant that he loved you ? That he was happy with the kiss, right ? You could be happy with what happened. Right ? His icy stare slowly turned to the plate of biscuit by his side. He grabbed one and very slowly rose it to your mouth. You bit it, still looking at him. He put the biscuit back where it was and looked at you, silent, his head tilted down a little. </p>
<p>“ This will be our secret... I will take care of you. I promise. “</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. The ceremony</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>After this soft kiss, Ben and you parted ways. He had to work and you had to rest. </p>
<p>Ethan took you to different stations through the week to run more tests. Apparently the baby was doing well. And for the first time you got to see it moving in you. You shivered as you saw its forms drawing on the screen and your hand moved up to the glass and caressed it.<br/>
“Waw…”<br/>
“Your baby is in perfect health. Congratulations.”<br/>
“But… I don’t understand… I haven’t taken any medicine nor changed my habits.”<br/>
“Welcome to the Island. [Y/N]. Now, I’m sure you believe us and the amazing property of This place.”<br/>
“Yes… Yes I do! Thank you Ethan.”<br/>
“You’re welcome.”</p>
<p>You moved your hand back to your belly and rub it softly. Your baby. You couldn’t help but smile. You had to tell Ben, he would be so happy for you! And Richard! You had to tell Richard as well. You nodded and sat, grabbed your clothes and got driven back to your place by Ethan. You stepped in your house and took a deep breath. Home. Home sweet home. Life had never felt better than today. You walked to the fridge and grabbed some leftovers you still had from the different invitations you had until now and walked to the microwave with them. You stood in front of it and watch your plate moving in circles. At the very moment the microwave biped, you heard the bell ringing. You walked to the door and opened it on Richard. </p>
<p>“Hey Richard. Do you want to come in ?”<br/>
“No, thank you, I won’t bother you. I just came here to tell you to come to the beach tonight at 8pm. Wear a white dress please.”<br/>
“This sounds very mysterious.”<br/>
He smiled.<br/>
“Don’t worry [Y/N], I’m sure you will be very happy with what’s happening…” he leaned forward and whispered “It’s a party for you.” He moved back. “ Don’t be late. “</p>
<p>You watched him walking away and walked back in the house, grabbed your plate and a fork and sat to eat. A party. For you. How strange. But eh, this had to be a good thing. Everyone would be here. Everyone. You ate slowly, took a shower and searched in your wardrobe for a white dress. Of course there was one. They really thought about everything. You put it on. Thank God it stretched with your belly. You sat on your couch and looked at yourself in this white dress. A white dress… A white dress for a party in your honour… Could it be… Oh no, it couldn’t. It would never be Ben asking you to marry him at sunset on that beach. That was IM-PO-SSI-BLE. … But what if ? No. No, impossible. </p>
<p>You kept wondering about this possibility with a smile on your face. You thought you were worse than a child daydreaming of prince charming coming to rescue you on his horse. But everything was going so well… You deserved that happiness at last.<br/>
Time passed.<br/>
7:30pm.<br/>
Time to move. </p>
<p>You got up and slowly walked to the beach. The sun was slowly setting on the sea. A few other persons were walking beside you, smiling, all dressed in white. You really were wondering what that was all about. You finally arrived on the beach, tiki torches leading the way to the sea. A lot of persons were standing there, chatting. At the end of the way was Ben and Richard, also chatting, low. Ben was really beautiful in this white tunic. His beautiful blue eyes reflected the lights of the torches. You watched him with your eyes charged with love when he turned his face and looked at you, smiling. Aw. AWW. Richard nodded and walked to you. </p>
<p>_______</p>
<p>He watched you, standing with your feet sinking in the sand. Today was a big day, a wonderful day, maybe the most beautiful day of his life, -after having Alex of course-. He watched Richard walking to you and taking your hand and dragging you to Ben’s side. He smiled softly seeing the slight panic in your eyes. He smiled gently and looked down at yours lips and lean on you. </p>
<p>“Relax [Y/N], it’s all good. “<br/>
“Why are we here ?”<br/>
He chuckled and looked at the crowd.<br/>
“My dear friends, thank you all for joining on this very special day, because today, [Y/N] is officially joining us as a member of this tribe.” Cheers. “She got blessed by the Island and got the help she asked.” He turned to you. “Tonight, [Y/N] I make you one of us.” His smile never ever had been this wide. He put a necklace of flowers around your neck, cupped your face and moved closer to kiss your cheek. He whispered to your ear. “Welcome among us my darling.”</p>
<p>He moved back and the crowd walked to you, offering you more necklaces, hugging you, congratulating you, Richard smiled and kissed your cheek, proudly, welcoming you to the tribe, followed by Ethan, Goodwin, Danny, Bea and everyone else. Ben watched you while standing a bit to the side. He walked a bit further on the beach and let everyone come to shake your hand. He thought about the luck he had that the Island accepted you and saved your baby. He couldn’t imagine having to send you away. You were a part of him and now a part of the Island. And now you two would grow old on this Island, together… If the baby was born without causing your death, but that, no one told you about it. And Ben would certainly not be the one to do so.  </p>
<p>____</p>
<p>You looked around you and searched for Ben once everybody was gone. You walked on the beach until you found him, sitting on the sand. You sat by his side and took the necklaces off. He didn’t turn his head, still watching the sun going down. </p>
<p>“You should go home before you catch a cold.”<br/>
“I wanted to see you.”<br/>
He smiled and turned his head. He caressed the flowers and took your hand.<br/>
“I’m happy you’re here.”<br/>
“I’m happy to be here.”<br/>
“Now we are linked. And you’re linked to the Island. She accepted you.” He turned his head. “I was so happy when Ethan told me the baby was well. It meant so many things. And now you’re here.”<br/>
“I am.” You stood silent and rested your head on his shoulder and watched the sun going down in the water. “They say love is watching in the same direction. Would that mean that we’re in love ?”<br/>
“People will say we’re in love…” he closed his eyes. “I promised I would take care of you, and now I’m really able to keep this promise. [Y/N]. “<br/>
You looked up at him and he looked down at you. He slowly moved his head down and kissed you.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. The dinner</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>After a few weeks dating secretly, Ben finally invited you to his place for the evening. Until now, you only shared shy kisses away from the other’s view. But it was time for you to be a more official couple. You both agreed on this, after all there was no need to hide from the rest of the village. You were happy together. </p>
<p>You stepped under the porch at seven. Knocked on the door and waited for Ben who opened it a few seconds later. He smiled at you and stepped aside to let you in. Alex was there sitting on the sofa, reading a book. You waved at her and she waved back politely. </p>
<p>“ Take a seat [Y/N]. Is there anything you’d like to drink ? “<br/>“ Nothing I can drink while being pregnant so... a glass of water will be fine. “</p>
<p>Ben smiled and walked to the kitchen and took out a bottle of fresh water and served you. He sat by your side, checked Alex and took your hand. </p>
<p>“ You look tired, darling. “<br/>“ I am. The baby is kicking a lot lately. I don’t have great nights. “<br/>“ I could make some tea for you. It’ll help you sleep. “<br/>“ You’re so kind Ben. “ he smiled softly, looked at your lips then turned to the kitchen. <br/>“ I’ve prepared some turkey with potatoes. And an apple pie for dessert. I hope you’ll like it.”<br/>“ I’m sure I will. “ he nodded then turned to Alex. <br/>“ Alex, come here please. “<br/>“ Yes daddy. “<br/>She jumped down the sofa and sat at the table, a bit impressed by you. She watched your belly bump while Ben grabbed the turkey in the kitchen. <br/>“ Does it hurt ? “<br/>“ Does what hurt ? “<br/>“ The baby. “<br/>“ No. No it’s not painful. “<br/>“ But you said that the baby was kicking you. “<br/>“ That’s because it moves around. My belly isn’t wide enough so the baby stretches my skin.” you watched her with a smile. “Do you want to touch it ?”<br/>“Sure.”</p>
<p>You placed her hand on your belly and watched her focusing on the sensations under her palm. She opened big eyes when she felt the baby moving. She was a sweet little girl. She looked up at you and smiled. At the same moment, Ben arrived with the gigantic plate and the turkey in it. He stood over the table and started to cut the meat and served everyone then sat down. </p>
<p>The dinner was calm and simple. You asked Alex about her friends, her grades, her hobbies. And Ben talked to Alex about you, your origins, your activities. And you told her about your pregnancy, what it was like to be pregnant, all these kind of stuff. There was only Ben to be silent about himself and his past. “There’s nothing much to say. I was born on this island and always lived on it.” That’s what he said. But you wanted to know more, about him, his family, his friends, how he got to be the leader of the group. But all you got were very evasive answers. According to him it had always been the way it was today and that you knew everything there was to be known.  </p>
<p>You wished you knew more. More details so to speak. But you didn’t want to upset Ben. If he didn’t want to tell you just yet about himself, then it was his decision and you accepted it. You already had learn a lot about Alex and that was a good start to be part of this family. And Alex seemed to appreciate you. That’s all you wanted since your life on the Island was almost perfect on all points. </p>
<p>_____________</p>
<p>The dinner soon came to an end and Ben knew the evening would soon turn into night. He didn’t rush the dessert and gave some time for Alex to stay with you, until it was time for her to go to bed. He kissed the top of her head and she kissed your cheek. Then Ben got up and put her to bed, closing the door of her room. </p>
<p>He walked back to the living room and offered you some coffee or tea. You accepted some tea. He walked to the kitchen and put some water to be boiled in a kettle and thought about what he could say to you. How he could avoid talking about all these secrets he kept hidden. Being the leader was harder than you could imagine and he always had the one secret he couldn’t tell you about in mind: the fact that all pregnant women died on the Island when delivering. And he couldn’t afford loosing you. This experiment conducted by Richard and Ethan had to succeed or he would have to tell you goodbye forever, goodbye to his new found happiness—</p>
<p>Two arms around his belly. </p>
<p>Your arms. </p>
<p>He stopped thinking and turned to face you. He placed a gentle kiss on your lips and looked into your eyes while pulling your hair back behind your ears. <br/>“ What’s wrong [Y/N] ?”<br/>“ You spent the whole evening in the kitchen. I’m gonna be jealous of the spoons and pans.” He smiled. “I think things went well with Alex.”<br/>“ Yes they did. She’s accepting you very well. “<br/>“ Does she know about us ? “<br/>“ I didn’t tell her but, she knows. “<br/>“ She’s such a smart little girl. Much like her father. “ he chuckled while cuddling you. <br/>“ Don’t make me blush, darling. “ </p>
<p>He stood silent while softly rocking you in his arms, smelling the scent in your hair, feeling your gentle hands on his chest. He smiled. A genuine smile. He was happy. His palms tightened around your shoulders. He closed his eyes and felt your belly against his groin. </p>
<p>“ Can I touch your belly ? “<br/>“ Sure. You’re lucky, the baby always is more active during the night. “</p>
<p>He felt your skin under his hand and shivered. Focusing on the strange feel he had against his palm. That’s when he felt the baby kicking. He jumped a bit, surprised and looked down, his mouth half opened. This was really strange. Until now, he never dared asking the pregnant women to touch their bellies. You were such a discovery. He looked at your tummy and suddenly felt the urge to hold you tight against him. He looked up into your eyes, petrified and leaned on you to kiss you, a kiss that you welcomed a bit surprised. But what followed surprised both of you...</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. In the Island’s bluest eyes</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is the kinky chapter. </p>
<p>Explicit depiction of sex. </p>
<p>You’ve been warned.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ben slowly moved his hands down your spine, still holding you against him, hugging you tighter with each breath. He looked straight up into your eyes and told himself how beautiful you were, his lips pressed against yours. He felt your delicate arms wrapping around his shoulders and moved his head down so he could kiss you in a better position. He kept you tight against him and slowly walked backwards to the couch against which he sat. He pulled back from his kiss just a second to look at your face, your beautiful face he never had enough of. He cupped your small cheeks with his hands and caressed your cheekbones with his thumbs. </p>
<p>“[Y/N].” Pause. “I want you.”</p>
<p>____________________</p>
<p>You felt butterflies in your belly, and that wasn’t because of the baby. Did Ben really just said that to you ? You felt desire moving up your spine and suddenly you wanted his hands all over your body, you wanted to be all his, if you could have merged with him at this precise instant, you would have. You stared at him with your eyes wide open and your lips spread. </p>
<p>You did not realise that your silence felt like an eternity to him so he let his hands down and started to look away. You protested-</p>
<p>“ But, Alex- “<br/>“ She’s asleep. “ he turned his face to look at you. “ If you don’t want to do it, it’s your choice [Y/N], I won’t be mad at you. “<br/>“ I want to, Ben. “</p>
<p>He couldn’t help but smile softly. He caressed your forearms and let his hands down until they met yours. He held them, forming two big fists together and silently pulled you with him to his bedroom. He opened the door and the both of you disappeared behind it. He lit up one of the lamps on his bedside tables and walked back to you to hug you, still cuddling you. </p>
<p>While kissing you, he delicately unbuttoned your shirt, slowly showing your skin. He slowly pulled your shirt back, wrapped his arms around your waist and kissed your shoulders with sloppy kisses. You shivered with pleasure and your nipples hardened while your hand moved up to his neck, holding his face against your skin. He kept on kissing you while pulling your shirt down then moved his head up to kiss you. </p>
<p>He took off his shirt as well and put it down then, gently pushed you on the bed and moved by your side not to lie on you. He untied your bra and threw it backwards and watches your breasts, swollen with what would soon be milk. He moved a gentle hand on your sensitive nipples and moved his fingers in circles around them before holding you whole in his hand. He kissed you passionately while kneading your beast, moving his head down from time to time to kiss your jaw. </p>
<p>After a while, he started to lick and suck your nipples, your hands in his hair, you, panting, aroused with each rub of his tongue on your flesh, he undid your pants while sucking on you, your belt, your zipper and sat between your legs to take off both your shoes and pants. </p>
<p>That’s when he moved over you. Your belly blocked your view and you couldn’t see how tight his pants were becoming around his cock. He stood over you, standing up on his arms and looked at you with such a charming smile that you melted. He looked down at your belly and kissed it gently while kicking his shoes off the bed and taking off his pants. He kneeled between your legs and put his hands on your knickers. You trembled, anxious for what would come. He very slowly took off your panties, threw them aside and caressed your thighs. </p>
<p>You sat up to kiss him and cuddled him and took a look at his underpants. He sat and took off his socks and you did so as well, struggling a bit with your belly. He got up and took a condom in his nightstand. You couldn’t help but watch him. He was exactly the way you imagined him, because you did imagine this scene, at night, alone, in your bed. And it was happening right now. </p>
<p>He cracked open the condom and took it out. That’s when you tilted. <br/>“ Why a condom ? Not like I could get pregnant. “ he chuckled and looked at you. <br/>“ Cleaner. You won’t be dripping with fluids when we’ll be done. “</p>
<p>Right. Ben is always right. He slept it on and sat between your legs, gently caressing your thighs. He was so shy that he barely watched your eyes anymore, holding tight upon your knees. Your caressed his fingers and nodded to show your approval. He moved closer. </p>
<p>There you felt it, pressed against you, slowly penetrating your skin, spreading you open inch by inch, shaking with a mix of desire and apprehension. He looked down into your eyes and kept on filling you until he completely buried himself into you. You gasped. The last time you had slept with someone was so long ago. </p>
<p>He pulled you on his lap and held you tight against him, his fingers digging in the flesh of your waist and your thigh. He felt so good. The way you wanted him to be. Now sitting on top of him, you cupped his face and he closed his eyes. You kissed him and made the first move, up and down his cock. He gasped as well, opened his eyes and looked at you. He was so beautiful. You looked at him with a burning desire and repeated the same movement you did before. </p>
<p>He let you lead at first, letting you choose the pace you wanted, his hands keeping you against him, slipping on your sweaty body. Each time you heard him moan was a bigger turn on than the one before. He went back to kissing your body as you accelerated, feeling his hot tongue against your burning skin and a cold wind going up and down your spine. </p>
<p>And he let you fall down on your back, putting his arms on each side of you to top you, and took the lead, slamming his body against you, clenching his teeth together, his heart pounding as fast as yours, you felt your face frowning as the frictions inside of you were sending sparkles and you grabbed his neck to hang yourself upon him. </p>
<p>His cock sinked deeper in you while his balls rebounded on your ass, and you both knew you were about to come, you wouldn’t last much longer, and you craved for more and more, and you opened your eyes to look into the bright blue of his, and felt yourself wet, so wet that Ben could easily slip in and out from you, you bent your back and came on him, strangling your scream in your throat while your muscles clenched on his cock, triggering his orgasm as well, filling the condom more and more , his fingers closing tight on your wrists while groans escaped his throat, he still was moving in you, pressed up in you, looked down at your face, both of you panting, drizzling sweat, he blinked and looked at you, mesmerised. </p>
<p>This had been far beyond your expectations. You felt so sad when he pulled out from you and sat on the edge of the bed. You watched the ceiling while hearing him taking off the condom and tying a knot. He disappeared for a few seconds then came back in the bedroom and came lying by your side. He looked at the ceiling you with you, breathing slowly. </p>
<p>He took your hand and smiled softly. You two started giggling, low and cuddled together, silently, in love, happy.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. My Life</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>After this wonderful night, you and Ben were officially a couple, and you could see that the villagers behaved differently towards you. Everyone except Richard who looked like he expected this. The others were a little more distant with you. They kept on inviting you to parties and clubs but you were now known as ‘Ben’s girlfriend’. Why that sudden change ? Why weren’t they happy for you ? Maybe was it Ben’s position as leader that impressed them, but in the end, you were the same person as before. In case of need, you could even talk to him in their favour. </p><p>You thought about that for the first weeks during which the changes in their behaviour was the most obvious, between that and the baby, you had almost no time to rest whereas you had everything you could wished for. You rubbed your belly and looked at Ben. At least he was here for you. You observed him working, bending over his books with his glasses on the edge of his nose. He turned to you from time to time with a small grin on his lips. </p><p>You soon reached seven months of pregnancy and everything seemed ok. You went to Ethan’s with Ben and watched him observing the doctor with great caution. They never spoke in front of you. Actually, you never knew anything about the baby while the two were together. You waited outside. Ben walked out and smiled to you then Ethan joined you, saying that the baby was doing good. But the injections you were receiving until now needed further application to be effective. </p><p>“ You see, until now we administered you this injection as some kind of a vaccin but you might need more cares. “<br/>“ Do you mean that, there’s something wrong with the baby ? “<br/>“ No, not at all- “ Ethan turned to Ben and stuttered. “ We just need to be careful. You know, you came to us with a weakened foetus so, it’s normal to be extra careful. “<br/>“ But, the baby is fine, right ? “<br/>“ The baby is in perfect shape. “ Ben said. “ But we worry about you. You need to rest now. We will keep an eye on you more, frequently. “<br/>“ I feel good Ben. “<br/>“ I know. I know you do. But listen to us. Please. [Y/N]. “<br/>“ I don’t want to be locked up in the house. The others are already looking at me in funny ways. “ the two men looked at each other’s while you were protesting. “ That’s unfair. Ben you can’t keep me prisoner !”<br/>“ Calm down [Y/N], this is not what we mean. We will just, keep you monitored. “<br/>You kept silent for a second. <br/>“ Why am I never in contact with the other pregnant women ? “<br/>Ben turned to you. <br/>“ Why are you suddenly so suspicious? “<br/>“ It’s not sudden. “<br/>“ If it really bothered you, you could’ve told it to me earlier, don’t you think ? “<br/>“ Maybe. “<br/>“ Have I ever given you a reason to doubt of me ? “<br/>“ No. You did not. “<br/>“ Then trust me when I say we will just keep a closer eye on you. Alright ? “ he took your hand. <br/>“ Right... I’m sorry Ben. Hormones I guess. “<br/>“ I know. Go home, I’ll catch up on you. “<br/>“ Alright. “</p><p>He kissed you and let you leave the building while he stood behind with Ethan. </p><p>_____</p><p>“ You haven’t told her, did you ? “<br/>“ No Ethan, I did not. “<br/>“ She should know. “<br/>“ Why should she know that her life is threatened ? Don’t you think she will live a happier life if she doesn’t worry day and night about the days she has left to live ? “<br/>“ You’re hiding that to her! She deserves to know. “<br/>“ Ethan. You keep silent, you hear me. We have no certainty about her eventual death. She is not from the island. And Jacob already granted her a healthy baby. Why would she die ? “<br/>“ ... “<br/>“ You know the best thing both for her and for you is to conduct this experiment to its term. Because if she learns the truth now, Ethan, she will blame you as much as me, don’t forget that. “<br/>“ Alright Ben. It’s your choice. And I will obey you. But I do not agree with any of this. “<br/>“ All I ask from you is to take care of her. That’s all. “</p><p>And he left the room. Ben always hated when someone dared to defy his authority, even more now that you were his and part of his plans. He had to protect you from everything, no matter what it would take. He joined you, keeping an apparent smile when really, everything he wanted to do was to punch Ethan down and take you to a safe place. </p><p>But there was no safer place than the island. Or at least, Ben did not know of any another place. He worried more than he let it be known. He knew the risks that your pregnancy involved but kept them silent. It was his way of coping with them. He wanted to be in control of everything and that very much included you. Knowing what you were doing at every single second of the day, what you would do or say and even what you thought, that was everything he had in his head. Aside from Alex, Jacob and the Island. </p><p>And Ethan would NOT come and ruin his plans for your futur. The doctor knew anyways that he’d better not mess with Ben. He knew his place. And he knew what to do. He would obey. Ben knew it. </p><p>And so the small man took your hand and walked ahead, looking very confident, to your place, smiling, as if everything was back to normal. This normality, he would keep it as a tender secret and illusion that he would grow for you.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. My fear</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I added a little reference to Mira Furlan's Danielle Rousseau since she passed away a few days ago. She was a good actress and I loved her character. I'll certainly add more later, but for now, enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>As you walked back to the buggy, you heard Ben’s light footsteps following you. He smiled to you but you could tell something was odd. It wasn’t one of those sincere smile Ben had when you two cuddled on his sofa, it was, something else, a kind of façade. You simply smiled back and waited for him until he reached the buggy. You two climbed in and remained silent until you reached the columns. He walked out and knelt to open the small locker but as he did so, he froze. You looked at him, wondering what was wrong. He got up on his feet and watched around him, staying silent, his piercing blue eyes scanning the surroundings.<br/>
“Ben ? Is something wrong ?”<br/>
He grabbed the gun he had attached to his belt and walked quickly to the buggy, sat behind the steering wheel and drove backwards.<br/>
“Ben, tell me what’s wrong.”<br/>
“It’s her.”<br/>
“Who, her ?”<br/>
He turned to you.<br/>
“The autochthone.”<br/>
You stood silent, shocked; the last time you heard about autochthones was when Richard had told you about them, and the last time you checked, you were supposed to be in security. Well, except for the day of you arrival when you got shot at. Ben drove quickly through the leaves and woods, his eyes wide open to watch where he was going, avoiding what you weren’t sure about yet. You held your round belly while looking around you. Weren’t the columns supposed to protect you ? Weren’t you safe on the other side ? Too many questions flooded your mind but the bumps on the road kept bringing you back to the urge of the situation.<br/>
Ben parked near some kind of warehouse with a big antenna on the top, a few cows mowing in a nearby field. He jumped down and took your wrist.<br/>
“Come with me [Y/N], quick.”<br/>
He rushed in while holding your hand, his grip had never been so tight. He watched around him and penetrated the building, speaking a language that sounded slavic, Russian maybe. A man showed up from a nearby room and you jumped in surprise.<br/>
“Ben, you should’ve told me you were coming. I almost shoot you!”<br/>
“I’m actually surprised you didn’t. That’s not much like you.”<br/>
“I’ve been… Busy. Who’s our guest ?”<br/>
“The reason why I’m here. [Y/N] this is Mikhaïl, you can trust him; at least when he’s in a good mood… he won't hurt you.” silence “I need you to hide her in the basement. Danielle is prowling around the border. We must take care of this problem. Now.”<br/>
“And what do you think I’ve been up to until now ? “<br/>
Ben sighed and rolled his eyes and disappeared in the room next to the one you were standing in while Mikhaïl moved around a coffee table and a rug revealing a hatch. Ben came back with a rather large riffle. Mikhaïl opened the hatch and turned to you.<br/>
"After you."
“Ben…” you said, scared. He walked to you and took your hand.<br/>
“It’s ok, I will be back very soon. You will be safe down there. I want you to sit on the sofa, drink something hot and wait for me until noon. Then I’ll be back and we’ll go back to the village.”<br/>
“What if you’re not back ?”<br/>
“I will be.”<br/>
He kissed you and caressed your hair then walked out of the room. The last thing you heard was the metallic sound of the hatch closing on you. You sat on the sofa like Ben said and took some boiling water from the kettle nearby. You filled a mug with it and sat back, sipping on this hot water since nothing was left to brew in. You thought about Ben and worried for him. Worried for the baby. This morning was a really tough one. You wanted peace. </p>
<p>__________</p>
<p>Meanwhile, Ben and Mikhaïl were hunting down Danielle, the traps she had left on the way were easily diffused by the two men. They walked silently while observing the slightest movement of leaf, the tiniest crack of branches, anything that could indicate that they weren’t alone. But Danielle was a secondary problem compared to what Ben feared: the smoke. He knew that if the columns were off then it meant the village could be attacked. But the thing he didn’t understand was how Danielle had managed to turn down the power.<br/>
They got back to the fence and Ben knelt to take a look at the barrier. </p>
<p>“When did you say the French woman arrived ?”<br/>
“Early in the morning.”<br/>
“Did you see her deactivating the system ?”<br/>
“No. I only heard some kind of metallic sound. When I got out I saw a silhouette sneaking up to the columns.”<br/>
“And you didn’t think about telling me.”<br/>
“I don’t know if you noticed Ben, but the power was out when you arrived. I tried to put it back in order but-“<br/>
“Stop finding excuses and make up for your mistake. Find her.”<br/>
Mikhaïl sighed and nodded then disappeared in the thick forest. Ben took care of the current and managed to put the energy back on. That was a problem less… If, first, the monster didn’t infiltrate the village and second if Danielle didn’t sneak in either.<br/>
A crack.<br/>
A beep.<br/>
An alarm…<br/>
The monster.<br/>
Ben rushed to the buggy and drove straight to The Flame, knowing way too well what direction the smoke was taking, he saw it moving through the woods in your direction, he wouldn’t let anything happen to you, not now that he had the certainty that the village was safe! He decided to leave the road, thinking that he would win a few precious minutes over the smoke. And he did, he arrived at the warehouse and parked in front of it, closed the metallic door and sealed it, watched outside then rushed to the basement. He was reassured to see you sitting on the sofa and how relived you felt as he walked down. He joined you and took your hand.<br/>
“See, I told you I wouldn’t be long.”<br/>
Loud boom.<br/>
Metallic sounds, The Flame was attacked.<br/>
“Stay silent.”<br/>
He looked around him, checking the sounds, not noticing how petrified you were, how scared you felt. Your body was completely frozen. Though he held you tight, he focused more on your survival than your feelings at the moment. Eventually, the clicks of the monster disappeared away. He took a deep breath and relaxed a second before hearing metallic knocking on the door and Mikhaïl shouting on the other side of the door. He sighed and looked down to you.<br/>
“Are you ok ?”<br/>
“No.”<br/>
“I’ll get you home now.”<br/>
“What was that thing?”<br/>
“I can’t tell it to you.”<br/>
“Don’t lie to me Ben.”<br/>
“I’m not lying.” He stared into your eyes. “[Y/N], if you love me, trust me. I will tell you everything, just, not, now.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. My escape</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>As Ben brought you home, you kept his hand tightly gripped in yours. If he didn’t want to tell you about this Island, you’d make him and would not give him rest until he does. But he remained silent the whole time. Once you reached the village, he helped you down the buggy and took you inside. A few villagers watched you disappearing behind Ben’s door. You watched him walking to his walkie-talkie, taking it and lifting it to his mouth, whispering some orders to whom you thought was Goodwin. But you kept on staring at him. He stood there, away from you, silent. He knew you were watching him. </p>
<p>“ ... What do you want to know ? “<br/>“ Everything. “<br/>“ You gotta be more precise. “ he said as he turned to face you. You stood silent for a few seconds. <br/>“ What was outside of the warehouse ? “<br/>“ I don’t know. “<br/>“ Ben ! “<br/>“ You asked me what it is, and I don’t know. “ you frowned, slowly understanding how Ben was leading this conversation. <br/>“ Is it dangerous ? “<br/>“ Not to us. “<br/>“ Then why were we hiding ? “<br/>“ Because you don’t know ‘what it is’. “<br/>You sighed and sat down. <br/>“ Are there more buildings I don’t know about ? “<br/>“ What do you mean ? “<br/>“ I thought there only was the village and a few medical stations on this island. “<br/>“ There are other buildings indeed. “<br/>“ Why didn’t you tell me about them ? “<br/>“ Why would you need to know about them ? “<br/>“ Because I like to know where I live, Ben. “ he stared at you, silent. You stared back and took a deep breath. “ What happens with pregnant women, Ben ? “<br/>“ They die. “</p>
<p>You turned pale in a second, feeling sweat falling down your spine. For a minute you wondered if you heard correctly but there was no doubt: pregnant women died on this Island. A wave a question flooded your mind and you couldn’t focus on any of them. It explained why they went missing one after the others once they delivered. They were resting, yes, but in the ground. You felt your baby kicking and this brought you back to reality. You were panting, low and Ben was sitting in front of you. You rose your eyes to meet his. He bore an expression mixing ‘I’m sorry’ and ‘I told you so’. You put your hand on your baby and looked at Ben. </p>
<p>“ Richard told me you would save my baby, not that it would kill me! “<br/>“ Richard told you what he had to say to bring you on this Island. “<br/>“ Why me ? There are dozens of other women with sick foetuses. “<br/>“ There are. “<br/>“ ... Then I want to go back to my place. “<br/>“ You can’t. “<br/>“ You’re keeping me hostage ? “<br/>“ The Island won’t let you leave. “<br/>“ ‘The Island’ what Island ? A piece of land won’t keep me from going anywhere! “<br/>You stood up and grabbed your coat. Ben stood up quickly. <br/>“ Where are you going ? “<br/>“ I’m leaving. “<br/>“ [Y/N] you can’t leave ! “<br/>“ Watch me! “<br/>“ You’ll only manage to kill yourself ! “<br/>“ Then at least I’ll die trying ! I won’t stay here and watch death coming for me. “ </p>
<p>And with that you left, walking determined to the pier. Some villagers waved at you, Tom asked you what you were doing but you just kept on walking until you reached your destination. Ben was behind you and watched you running to what would certainly be your final destination. You watched him talking with Tom while reaching the wooden planks. The boat and the submarine. The choice was easy to make. You jumped in the boat and stood near the seats. Béa rushed to you and grabbed your wrist. </p>
<p>“ You have nothing to do on this boat ! “<br/>“ Let go of me ! “<br/>“ Get out of the boat ! “<br/>“ Leave her alone Béa. “ Ben said very calmly. He watched you from the pier, silent. He seemed hurt. He knelt and held the boat, looked at the water then up to you. “ You don’t have to do this [Y/N]. “<br/>“ Then take me back home, Ben, please. “<br/>“ I can’t. “<br/>You looked down, tears in your eyes. <br/>“ Then goodbye. “ Béa grabbed your hand as you turned the key. <br/>“ You can leave swimming if you want, but the boat stays with us. “<br/>“ Let her go. “ Ben said. He took a large pistol out of his pants. And pointed it at you. “ If you’re tired of running away, shoot it and we’ll find you. “</p>
<p>You took the gun carefully and watched Ben pulling Béa out of the boat. He looked at you, silent, frowning slightly. You turned the key and left the village. </p>
<p>_____</p>
<p>Ben was counting the hours, watching the horizon. The sun was setting. He observed the light slowly diminishing until the sky turned orange then purple and blue at last. Richard came by his side and watched the sea. </p>
<p>“ Ben. You should come back, the others are starting to ask questions. “<br/>“ Not now Richard. “<br/>“ Ben. She won’t come back. “<br/>“ The Island will bring her back. “<br/>“ You can’t stay here and wait to see the boat on the shore. “<br/>Ben turned to face him then looked at the village. He looked down at his watch and head back to the small houses. <br/>“ By now she certainly arrived on the other side of the Island. She will soon see the foot. She’s scared, she’s alone and she’s certainly hungry and thirsty. She’ll be home by the morning. You’ll get her yourself. “</p>
<p>____</p>
<p>Now that the moon was out, you couldn’t see where you were heading to anymore. The Island disappeared when the sky turned orange. This was ridiculous. You didn’t know where to go, nor for how long. You didn’t have anything to eat, to drink and the baby wasn’t moving to cheer you up. And you couldn’t stop thinking about Ben. The disappointment in his eyes when you jumped into the boat. You asked for the truth and left without thinking. And now you regretted it. Your survival instinct didn’t consider the risks and the consequences. You sat down and turned off the motor, desperate. You were alone, in the middle of the ocean, somewhere between Australia and the USA. </p>
<p>You listened to the waves rocking you and watched the stars. At least it wasn’t raining. You felt the gun on your back and grabbed it. You blindly touched it and guessed the curves of it. You managed to pull the little lever down to open it and felt two signal rockets in it. You would fuse them, Ben would come to rescue you and you would go back to this life that you loved so much. </p>
<p>Either you died trying to save yourself or you’d die in the arms of the man you loved. This was an easy choice and you should’ve never doubted it in the first place. You aimed at the sky and pulled the trigger. Nothing. It didn’t work. You tried again, once, twice, but the shot did not release. You fell back on the floor of the boat and felt tears rolling down your cheeks. Well then, you’d die alone on this boat. </p>
<p>As the morning lights pierced through the sky, you opened your eyes. The bottom of the boat. Well at least you were still alive. And you felt your belly contracting, hungry. You rolled over on your back and listened to the waves. That’s when you realised that the boat wasn’t moving anymore. You sat up quickly and watched around you. A shore. A land. Sand. The Island. You were back.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. My rescue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You jumped off the boat and felt the sand under your feet, warm and tender; you knew the smell of this beach by heart, it was the Island's. But you never went to this side of the Island. There was nothing except the forest in front of you and the sand. Well. Actually, not quite. There was something there, near the water, some kind of bulding, made of... Of stones ? And what was that on top ? A foot ? What the hell was that ? You started to walk towards the building but heard something in the forest. Branches cracking, no big deal. You slowly made your way to the small building but the noise in the forest repeated itself. Boars maybe ? No... It sounded bigger... Maybe more threatening ? You focused on the forest, frowning, trying to determine what was causing that noise. It was... Heavy... You took a breath, the wind-</p>
<p>A bear jumped out from the forest, a fucking polar bear roaring at you, running towards you on the beach, you ran to the building and saw a familiar silhouette out of it, Richard, it was Richard! He ran to you and grabbed you, panicking!<br/>" Where's the gun ? [Y/N] where's the gun ? "<br/>" It's, it's in the boat but, but it doesn't work ! "<br/>Richard ran to it, almost out of breath and leapt in the boat, grabbed the gun and fired the flare. The bear got on his back paws and roared. Richard starred at it and suddenly you could hear a loud noise resounding in the valley, and the second after, a giant black smoke collapsed on the bear, grabbing it and pulling it back in the forest with a loud sound of chains and pulley, clicking. A second later, the beach was empty. No more bear, no more smoke. Just a large crater in the sand and a long trail leading back the the forest. </p>
<p>You were sitting on the sand, your mouth wide open, staring at the forest, you couldn't move. Richard jumped off the boat with the gun and walked to you. He crouched near you and looked at you. <br/>" Are you ok ? " <br/>" ... No Richard! I'm not ! What the hell was that, what the hell was all that ? A fucking polar bear and, and, and that smoke, what the, what- "<br/>" Calm down, calm down you are shocked, it's ok, I got you now. "<br/>" And, and the gun, I tried to fire it but it didn't work and now, now you, you just come over and fire it and- "<br/>" [Y/N] breathe. It's ok now. Calm down. Look at me. " you looked up at him and took deep breaths to calm down. <br/>" Why didn't Ben come to rescue me..? "<br/>" He sent me to get you. He knew you would end up here. "<br/>" Yes but why didn't he come ? " Richard sighed softly and helped you up. <br/>" You decided to come back for Ben, or for yourself ? "<br/>" I... I don't know... I'm confused. And I'm tired. <br/>Richard helped you up and gave you an apollo bar and a bottle of water.<br/>" I know it's not much, but  don't worry, you'll have more things to eat soon. "<br/>He took your coat and held you under his arm. <br/>" Where are we going to ? "<br/>" There's someone you shoudl meet. Come. And don't worry, as long as we're together, nothing can happen to you. "</p>
<p>He smiled softly and you looked up into his dark eyes. Richard never failed your trust. You felt like he never betrayed you at all, well except for the lies Ben had told him to tell you. He sounded sometimes so wise, and gentle, definitely older than he looked like. You then moved your eyes around and realised he was leading you to that small building. What was it ? What was he doing inside of it ? Wasn't he going to bring you back to the village ? You had a lot of questions running inside your head but the most important was that you were safe and that Richard was by your side. Soon you'd see Ben, and everything would be back to the normal.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. My Discoveries</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You walked in, still held by Richard. He looked so confident that you didn’t even think about asking a single question. You just followed him. He slid into some kind of tight corridor and ended up facing a brick wall. He turned to you, looking down then up at you. </p>
<p>“ One thing, [Y/N], before we walk in. You must promise me that you’ll keep everything that happens in here a secret, until it’s time for you to tell the truth. “<br/>“ What do you mean ? What’s gonna happen ? “ <br/>“ ... you’re gonna meet Jacob. “</p>
<p>Hearing this name froze your blood and you could feel your spine straightening in a second. You couldn’t speak so you just nodded in response. Richard turned around and placed his hands on the brick wall and pushed it with his whole body, it clicked and slowly moved around to reveal a very poorly lit room, much larger than you expected, with columns, some kind of guy-rope and a camp fire in the middle of the room. </p>
<p>A man was sitting there, watching the fire, turning his back on you, drinking from a glass made with what looked like leather. Richard walked in as confidently as before and turned to face you, his face was calm and serene. He offered his hand to you and you reached it, grabbed it right and joined him to the camp fire. You walked around the columns and started to see the features of Jacob’s face, his long bony face with blond hair. And somehow, you could see in his eyes that reflected the fire, some kind of tiredness and age that you never saw anyone’s eyes, anyone’s except Richard. </p>
<p>You kept silent and sat down between him and Richard. Your eyes were glued to this strange man. And finally he looked up at you. </p>
<p>“ Hello. “<br/>“ ... H-hello. “ he smiled softly and looked at Richard. Figuring how he stood silent you looked at Richard who was gently smiling. “ Hum... so... I’m. I’m honoured to meet you. As I understood it’s a privilege to meet you. “<br/>“ A privilege ? I would rather say that the privilege for you is to be sitting here, between me and Richard. “<br/>“ Hum... do you, do you live here ? “<br/>“ Sometimes. “<br/>“ Ok... “ he looked at you. <br/>“ You sound confused [Y/N]. “<br/>“ How, how do you know my name ? “<br/>“ It’s normal for me to know the name of anyone on the Island. “<br/>“ Why ? “<br/>“ Because I’m it’s keeper. “ you stared at him. “ Do you know why you are here, [Y/N] ? “<br/>“ Hum, to, to save my baby. “<br/>“ You are here because Benjamin Linus wants you to be here. “<br/>“ What do you mean ? “<br/>“ He’s the one who brought you here. Through Richard. “ he looked at Richard. You turned to look at him as well and he looked down at you. “ Don’t blame him though. He’s only doing what he’s told. “<br/>“ ... You’re right. I’m confused. I haven’t been drinking not eating for a day and I think I got sunburned- “<br/>“ You’re Lost. I would probably be if I were in your shoes. Actually, Richard was just like you when I met him, all these years ago. “<br/>“ Have you two known each other for a long time ? “<br/>“ A few centuries now. “ your eyes opened wide. <br/>“ A few, what ? “<br/>“ A few centuries. “ Jacob stares at you then back at the campfire. “ This Island has more secrets than there is time for you to understand them, so I will get to the point: you are deeply precious. Both you and your baby. As a matter of fact, all pregnant women die on the Island when they deliver, and I will not tell you why. But what I can tell you, is that you won’t die, and this will be an issue. “<br/>“ I hardly see how it could be one.. “ Jacob turned to face you. Richard took your wrist to make you turn around. <br/>“ This Island is here to keep you from harm. But if you deliver your child, nothing will save you from what could happen. “<br/>“ Then... then why did you bring me back ? You did bring me back right ? Ben said the Island wouldn’t let me leave. “<br/>“ And he’s somehow right. “ Jacob said before Richard spoke. <br/>“ He brought you back on the Island so you would crush Benjamin’s heart. “<br/>“ Are you out of your mind ? “<br/>“ As long as Ben wants you, he will hunt you down wherever you go and bring you back here. The only way for you and your baby to survive is to live away from him, with his ‘permission’. “<br/>“ But... I love Ben. And he loves me. He could never hurt me. “<br/>“ Ben loves himself.” Jacob said, “ He won’t hurt you directly, because he doesn’t know the forces that are at stake, all of them relying on the birth of your child. “<br/>“ ... I’m not sure I’m liking where this conversation is going. “<br/>“ [Y/N] you must know that you have a choice. You won’t be forced by anyone to do anything. Look into yourself, and find the right thing to do. “<br/>“ But... But then maybe I can leave, with Ben ? “ Jacob stood silent. “ Maybe we could all survive together without taking any risk ? Jacob ? Would that be possible ? “<br/>“ Anything is possible. “<br/>“ Then, then I’ll do that. I will do it. I’ll bring Ben here and we’ll leave together. “<br/>“ This you can’t do. “<br/>“ Why not ? “<br/>“ Because Benjamin never met me and he will not meet me through you. “<br/>“ What do you mean he never met you ? “ Richard sighed. <br/>“ [Y/N], what Jacob is trying to say, is that Ben has his own place and it is not between me and Jacob. You are so important to the Island. We are part of her because we grew old with her, but you, you’re still fresh and young, you have your whole life ahead of you. Even if Jacob says that anything is possible, one thing you can’t do is give Ben is innocence’s back. “<br/>“ Richard... “<br/>“ He brought you back because you had to hear the truth, to be sure to make the good choice. “ <br/>“ But... there are some many things I don’t understand, it all sounds gibberish, I, I don’t... I don’t know what to do, I don’t even know what to believe anymore... “<br/>“ [Y/N]. “ Jacob called. “ You don’t need to listen to us to know the truth. Just take a look at what you’ve seen so far. And why you decided to leave in the first place. Think everything around, question everything around. But most importantly: don’t die. “</p>
<p>This was the last sentence you heard from Jacob. As soon as you blinked, you were back in the boat with Richard. You wondered if it was all a dream, or if you had lost consciousness because of the sun... or if everything was real and you ended up collapsing because of the smoke and the dust in Jacob’s house. How reliable was he ? And Richard ? And... and Ben ? </p>
<p>You left with more questions than you had of answers, not even sure of the destination. You didn’t ask anything to Richard, yet. You would sleep just a little more, and hope everything would go away...</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. My remorses</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You were standing in the boat behind Richard and slowly started to recognise the village from afar. You gently rubbed your belly as the waves rocked you. It was almost noon. <br/>“What am I going to do ?” You asked.<br/>“I’m gonna take you to your place, then, it’s up to you to decide.”<br/>This wasn’t much of a help. How could you make a choice ? Everything happened so fast that you didn’t know what to do anymore. You almost felt like the first day you arrived on the Island, led by Richard to a place that could be your new home, confused, lost.  You reached the pier as noon rang in the village. Béa was waiting at the end of the pier, watching Richard. He turned to face you and smiled softly, helped you out of the boat and kept you against him. He didn’t respond to Béa’s stare but simply walked you through the village. A few villagers were looking at you. Or maybe was it at Richard’s, you couldn’t tell. <br/>You finally reached your place. Richard opened the door for you and stood still.<br/>“Aren’t you coming in ?”<br/>“I think you should get in there alone.”<br/>You stepped in this familiar house and heard Richard closing the door behind you. You put your coat down on the couch and turned around and jumped up startled. Ben was sitting in a seat right in front of you, with this enigmatic face, not showing a single emotion. You remained silent while watching him. <br/>“You’re back.”<br/>“Yes… Yes Ben, I’m back.”<br/>“Are you going to stay with us ?”<br/>“ … Probably.”<br/>“ OK.” He got up and walked to the door. “There’s a white dress on your bed. Put it on and join us on the beach at three.”<br/>“What’s happening ?”<br/>“Jenny delivered this morning. We’re gonna burry her.”<br/>And he disappeared. You sat down, exhausted. You had a few occasions of speaking with Jenny, but you couldn’t call you two friends. Actually, there weren’t a lot of villagers with whom you could say you were friend with. You rubbed your belly while thinking about Ben. You couldn’t blame him for being distant, after all, you had left him with the decision to never come back. But you were hurt by his indifference. <br/>You got up, grabbed something to eat, something to drink and decided to rest some more before the ceremony. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Three and the sun was still up in the sky. Ben was waiting for everyone to get on the beach, he was talking with Brian, Jenny’s husband, trying to cheer him up as they finished to place Jenny’s body on a wooden boat. She was beautiful for a dead woman. They could have burned her body when the night fell but Ben never wasted time ever. Because he knew how important it was to mourn someone and how quickly life could shift on the Island. <br/>He walked back to the beach and saw you joining the others. He kept a straight face while starring at you, not even turning his head to answer Brian’s questions. Many things were going through his head as well, the main one being how he could keep you alive on the Island and he had multiple options in mind, the one he considered the most was getting rid of your baby. But if he did so, he would also ruin all his efforts to find a solution to keep pregnant women alive. With Jenny’s death, he completely snapped. Not because he cared much about her, but because he didn’t know where you were nor if you were alive. And now that you were so close to him, he knew he wouldn’t allow a single second for your fantasises of leaving. <br/>He finally turned to the crowd and started his usual speech about the loss of one of them, about the regrets, the memories and then left Brian do the talking. Ben joined Tom on the side and watched Brian speaking while preparing the torches to lit the wooden boat. He held them tight in his hand until Brian finished his speech. He walked into the water and lit the boat with Brian then pushed it away to the horizon. The crowd slowly spread while Ben still as in the water up to his knees, wondering if he would have to do that with you one day. <br/>He turned and saw you still standing on the beach. He quickly walked out of the water and walked pass you, faking his disinterest in you. He put his shoes back on and stood up to look into your eyes. Silent. He watched your features, not yet wanting to make the first move. Seeing that you didn’t speak either, he started to walk in direction of the village.<br/>“I’m sorry Ben.” You said. He turned and hurriedly walked back to you.<br/>“You’re sorry ? You’re sorry [Y/N] ?” His blue eyes looked straight through you and you shivered. “I’ve been working hard to keep you and everyone else safe, trying to find a solution to keep you alive! I’ve been honest with you, I gave you everything and you left because you were scared. You’re not sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I couldn’t convince you that I love you and that I care for you.”<br/>“I didn’t want to hurt you, I was scared Ben. And I’m back here!”<br/>“And why are you back ?”<br/>“Because… Because I love you.”<br/>He looked into your eyes, shaking on the inside but not showing the slightest weakness on the outside. You cupped his face with your hands and stared back in his eyes. He felt his heart melting. He loved you, he couldn’t hold a grudge against you. He looked down and took your hands and pulled you against him to hug you. He wouldn’t cry, not in front of everybody, so he held you tighter. He breathed in your hair and closed his eyes, hoping that he wouldn’t be able to let go of you ever again. You were here, you were his, and he would not let this change. </p>
<p>Ever.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Over the Island's bluest eyes</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Smutty chapter</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>As you woke up, you realised you were in Ben’s arms, lying in bed next to him. The light was still on but Ben was asleep. It was late in the night. You turned your head and saw that it was two in the morning. You switched the light off and went back cuddling in Ben’s arms. You felt his arm tightening around your shoulders and you closed your eyes. You slowly started to remember how you arrived here. </p><p>As you and Ben were walking back to the village, he held your hand firmly in his. He wasn’t speaking, not showing any emotion, well, it was Ben after all. You followed him silently until you reached his house. He opened the door and pulled you in. You saw Alex sitting at the kitchen table. She looked up at you and smiled happily. You were quite a good distraction from her homework. You smiled back but Ben quickly stood between you two. He kissed Alex’s forehead and sent her to her bedroom. </p><p>You watched Ben walking to his desk and put his books back on his shelves.<br/>
“Sit down.” He said while putting his books up. You watched him. “You must be exhausted.”<br/>
“I’m tired indeed… But, I’ll stay here if you want me to.”<br/>
“It’s not like you had the choice anyway.”<br/>
“What do you mean ?” He turned to you and watched you.<br/>
“I mean that when you left, I reattributed your place to a new couple, they’ll arrive at the end of the week.”<br/>
“Why did you do that ?”<br/>
“Because you planned on never returning.” You thought for a moment, watching him.<br/>
“Why are you so shy with your feelings ?” Ben stuttered. He didn’t know what to answer.<br/>
“I’m not shy.”<br/>
“Yes you are. I know you’re upset that I left. But you wouldn’t be upset if you didn’t love me.”<br/>
“You know I do… But…”<br/>
“But what ?”<br/>
“But I feel like you abandoned me.”<br/>
“I did not. I came back.” He shook his head softly and sat down and rubbed his eyes. He was on the verge of crying. You joined him and hugged him tight. </p><p>You didn’t have a clear memory of what followed. Not much of a discussion. Ben was tender and weak in your arms, yet oh so proud. You could remember though that Ben had moved on pretty rapidly after that. While he was preparing the dinner, you thought about what happened the same morning, when you met Jacob. Was he still in the statue ? What about Richard ? What were him and Ben discussing earlier ? How could you manage to keep a secret from Ben..? And then Ben re appeared from behind the counter. He rubbed your belly and both of you talked about… about… You couldn’t remember. </p><p>You remembered though how Ben lead you to his bedroom. How he helped you undressing to take a shower, how his hands ran on your naked skin to soap your back. You remembered his fingers pushing in your skin to take off the smallest dust of sand on your body. You remembered the sensation of his hands running in your hair while shampooing them. Finally, you remembered the feeling his firm hands closing on your shoulders with a warm towel. </p><p>You remembered how he led you to his bed and sat you on the edge of it while rubbing your skin with the towel, how he knelt between your legs to dry each toe one after the other. You remembered how from this position, his head slowly made its way between your thighs and how his lips came to meet your labias. You remembered how your fingers settled on his head as his hot tongue licked you open, how the soft movement of his tongue pressed on your clit and how you moaned while he did so. You remembered how his hands holding your hips, guided you more closer to his head and how he penetrated you with his tongue. You gasping and moaning his name, falling backward on the bed, holding him; your hips rocking against his mouth, trying to feel him even more against you. You remembered looking down and seeing his blue eyes focusing on your pleasure then looking up into your own eyes, you remembered how it made you moan loudly. </p><p>You very clearly remembered when Ben’s fingers slid inside you, dug deeper and deeper while he was sucking on your clit; you remembered how your hips twisted in his hands and how hungry for you Ben looked. You remembered the fury and the desire in his eyes, how his spiked hair rubbed against your entrance when he lowered his head to bite your ass cheeks. You remembered how much you were impressed by his force as he moved your legs upward to put you in a better position. You remembered the drops of sweat running down your spine, the shivering goose-bumps on your skin, the cold tightening of your nerves synchronising with the teasing of your clit. You remembered the very moment when you started dripping, when Ben’s fingers started to move too easily in and out from you, when your muscles tightened around his fingers; yes, you remembered when you came in his hand while his thumb pressed against you. </p><p>You remembered when Ben licked you up clean.</p><p>You remembered when he got on his feet and brought you a pair of large pyjamas and helped you dressing up for bed. </p><p>You remembered when he disappeared in the bathroom and came out a few minutes later, joined you in bed and held you against him.</p><p>You remembered how his tight grip pressed you against him and how you slowly fell asleep in his arms. </p><p>You smiled while remembering this evening. You felt as if you never left. As if all of what happened yesterday was just a distant nightmare you didn’t live. There, in Ben’s arms, you realised that this was your home, and you wouldn’t leave it anymore, never again, if your destiny was to die on this Island in Ben’s arms then so it be. There was nothing else in the world anyway that you would want.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. His decision</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ben opened his eyes and grabbed his glasses. He looked down at you cuddled up in his arms. His hands slowly moved to your hair and moved aside a few strands that covered your eyes. He loved watching you sleep. He smiled softly and pulled you over him then slowly rocked you. He buried his nose in your hair and closed his eyes to think while sniffing the scent emanating from you, the delicate perfume of soap and shampoo. </p>
<p>Ben’s first thoughts went to the feeling of you on him, the weight of your head on his chest and your arms around his body. The second thoughts he had were for Alex. At that time of the morning, she probably still was sleeping, no need to rush to prepare the breakfast. Then he thought about the villagers. About Richard who brought you back the day before, the DHARMA stations he should still hide from you and eventually you. He always thought about you. The main problem he had at the moment wasn’t your desire to leave, that he could handle by keeping you by his side at any time. He would put you in handcuffs if he had to. His problem was the bump pressing against his hipbone, this baby bump. </p>
<p>From Ben’s perspective, this baby was nothing but a problem. First of all, the father had left you, and Ben wasn’t the father of this child. Well technically he wasn’t Alex’s either, but at least he didn’t abduct Danielle to live with her. Second of all, he was deeply jealous of this baby. Maybe you’d love the child more than you love him ? Maybe the child would have all your attention. And third, the most important, what if you didn’t survive childbirth ? In that case, neither problem 1 or 2 would matter. You were in his top 3 most important things so of course he would do anything he would be able to to keep you alive by his side on the Island. Even if it meant getting rid of your baby. He settled for that choice. He would make you give up on the child even before it is born. </p>
<p>____</p>
<p>You opened your eyes and blinked slowly, waiting for them to adjust to the light. The bed was empty but you could hear in the kitchen noises of pan and a cheerful Alex talking to her daddy. You sat on the edge of the bed and grabbed your robe, wrapped it around you and walked to the kitchen. You were welcomed by Ben and his lined pyjamas and Alex in hers. She smiles happily to you while biting in a pancake. </p>
<p>“ Come [Y/N]. I made breakfast. “ Ben smiled so gently you could feel your heart melting. You sat on the chair near him and kissed him. <br/>“ Eeeew. “ Alex said while Ben chuckled. <br/>“ Eat your pancake Alex. “ he turned his head and smiled at you. “ What would you like to eat ? “<br/>“ I don’t know. I’m so hungry that I could eat anything. “<br/>“ No need to eat anything, pick what you like best on the table. “ You did so and started to eat breakfast while Ben sipped his coffee. “ We should go to Ethan’s in the afternoon, to check on you... and the baby. “<br/>“ Yes, we should do that. “</p>
<p>So far so good. Ben looked happy, Alex as well. And you couldn’t feel any better than at this right moment while eating a breakfast prepared with love. The rest of the morning was calm and peaceful. Ben stayed home with you and read books while you were resting against him. It almost felt like you two were even more in love since you left. You loved feeling Ben’s hands on you. It gave you a sens of comfort no one managed to nail just right; until Ben. Lunch, Alex back home from school, eating, cleaning then waiting for the sun to lower a little so neither of you would get sunstroke. </p>
<p>You two left around three, it felt weird for both of you to be back in the buggy that drove you through the thick forest, the columns seemed so different. While Ben was driving you through the woods, you couldn’t help but look at the sky and wonder where the statue was, how tall it was, if it ever had been a whole one day. You wondered why Ben never ventured there, why he wasn’t curious enough to step in. You wondered why Ben was living in a lie and why Richard let all that happen. Then you remembered what Ben told you about most stations on the Island and places he never took you to. How many of them were they ? And where was the French woman ? Since she tried to kill you twice, she certainly had a place to rest at, right ? What would’ve happened if Richard didn’t get to you on time ?</p>
<p>But all that was just a distraction. After the recent events, you didn’t want to think any further. You were happy, that’s all that matters. The Island could keep her secrets.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. His plan</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ben’s plan was already starting as you two arrived at the station. There was absolutely no happenstance in the events from you walking out of the buggy to him holding you tight by the hipbone to the station. And then was so gentle with you, how could you even imagine that he was controlling each step you took? Even Ethan who had known him for years couldn’t decipher the look on Ben’s face. Who could ? And so Ben walked you inside so you could run tests, perfectly knowing that no matter what the outcome would be, you would give up on the baby willingly. He gave your hand to Ethan and left you alone. He browsed the papers he had while you were busy with Ethan. The Island really did you well. In a sense, it was an even bigger proof of Ben’s interest in you, after all, he had been waiting for so long to find someone who could deliver a baby and survive, and yet he was ready to give up on his experimentation on you, so he could keep you a little longer by his side. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>As you walked out of the room, Ben smiled to you and joined Ethan, not talking yet. It was Ethan who taught first:<br/>“ We’ll have to wait a few hours to know the results. I can’t tell you anything yet. “<br/>Of course he could tell you the results right now, but as Ben was standing on his side, I wasn’t quite sure of what he could say and what he should say. <br/>“ It’s okay, I can wait.” you answered. <br/>“ Why don’t you wait for me outside, I’ll join you as soon as I get the car’s key.” Ben said. <br/>“I’d rather stay with you. “<br/>Ben dis his best to conceal his disapproval and nodded softly. He took you by the hand and walked to the room he had left his stuff in. <br/>“ Ben. You’re not trying to hide anything from me, right ? “<br/>“ You’ve been sticking to me since you came back, I hardly see how I could hide anything from you. “ <br/>“ You’re a clever man. “<br/>He chuckled softly as you said this and turned to look into your eyes. <br/>“ Believe me [Y/N], there’s nothing that I’m not telling you that you wouldn’t find out about soon enough. “<br/>“ Uh... right. “<br/>You heard Ethan‘s foot step down the corridor, he joined you while reading your file. He stood in the door frame for a few seconds then nodded. <br/>“ You might need further examination, not baby-wise, I want to make sure that you’re in a good shape. “<br/>“ Should I do anything ? “<br/>“ We might have to take you to another medical station. With more equipment. “<br/>“ Maybe we should let [Y/N] rest a little now, Ethan. “<br/>The doctor shut his mouth and looked at Ben then you. <br/>“ Sure. You can lie down in the nursery if you want. “<br/>“ Will do. Ben, are you coming ? “ <br/>He turned his face and smiled softly. <br/>“ Well of course my love. “</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Your insistence on keeping Ben by your side was countering Ben’s plan; but as always, he was thinking everything ahead. He helped you lying down and sat by your side, took your hand in his and kept his eyes on you. If everything had happened the way he thought about, he wouldn’t have to move a finger for his plan to work. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>____</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Forty-five minutes in this nap on Ben’s side, everything was perfect, and you had managed to keep Ben by your side. When suddenly, you heard a noise from the corridor, something that obviously wasn’t Ethan, because he was running tests in the last room; and what was even more frightening, was the look on Ben’s face, has his face moved up to take a look into the corridor, as if he didn’t know what was the origin of this sound. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“ Ben what’s happening ? “<br/>“ I don’t know. “<br/>“ Please, stay with me. “<br/>“ Don’t worry [Y/N], I won’t leave your side. “</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And he did not. But, as Ben held your hand, the lights went out. The emergency lighting turned on, and you didn’t know if you were more anxious about Ethan and the tests in the last room, or about the reason behind this breakdown. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“ Ben... “<br/>“ Shhh... “</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He moved his hand to his pants and grabbed the gun he hid under his shirt. He got up and slowly walked to the door, not opening it, but watched through the small window. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“ I don’t see anything. “</p>
<p> </p>
<p>You kept on repeating to yourself that everything was going to be alright, and it could’ve been so if it wasn’t for this moment when the lights turned completely off, and you ended up in a thick dark place, where you couldn’t see anything at all, not even Ben who was a few feet away from you. You tried your best to keep silent, after all you knew that Ben was just here, you could hear him breathing. You heard the metallic click of the gun and you saw Ben’s features lightly lit through the door by something that wasn’t stable, fire maybe, a torch of some kind. Ben stared at the corridor and the flame burning on the other side. Your heart pounded in your chest and you could almost feel your body contracting with fear, no... not your body... your belly. Could it be ? </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“ Ben ! “</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As this scream escaped your mouth, the door slammed open, the only thing you saw was Ben’s terrified expression before the door exploded on his skull and him falling to the ground. The silhouette holding the torch walked in and grabbed your wrist tightly, you screamed from the bottom of your lungs but Ben wasn’t reacting at all, the flame burned through your eyes and you couldn’t help but close them as you felt the silhouette dragging you away, the last thing you heard was Ethan’s voice calling your name before you passed out.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. His tracking</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ben walked in the forest, stepping over leafs covered in mud with very light steps. He followed the trail you had left through the mangrove. His piercing blue eyes spied each little clue that could lead to where you were, though he knew exactly with whom you were. After all, Ben’s plans never failed, and your kidnapping was the first step of his evil plan. From time to time he stopped walking and sat on a dead stump so he would press the little bump on his forehead, drink some water and check if his his gun wasn’t gripped. The air was thick and wet but Ben wouldn’t stop until he’d find the place you had been taken to. He had a few ideas in mind but no certainty and he had already lost some time after the incident at the station. </p>
<p>Ben had waken up about five minutes after you were taken. Ethan had laid him down on the bed you had been and took the little glass shards of the window out of Ben’s face, leaving a few blood marks and scabs. But Ben didn’t feel wounded. He had been beaten up a thousand times, had passed out a hundred more and didn’t vont the number of times he had been bleeding. In a sense he didn’t care anymore for physical hurt, he was way pass that: a few scars wouldn’t hurt him and soon the Island would heal him. The only thing that was left of the incident was this bump. As soon as Ethan was done, Ben had grabbed a bag and put in it a walkie talkie, a few bottles of water and his gun along with your medical file. Neither Ben nor Ethan talked; after all, the surgeon knew very well that Ben was aware of the situation and nothing he could tell him would help him. And so he just let him go. </p>
<p>“ Ethan. “ Ben said as he reached the door. “ Don’t tell anybody. “</p>
<p>It had been an hour now since he left. He was quite amazed by the strength of your abductor, carrying you away for such a long time and distance must be quite exhausting, he thought. But Ben’s plan wasn’t quite to bring you back as soon as he would’ve found you. After all, he had triggered your kidnapping. The road he had taken to the station was different than before, the motor had roared louder, and his driving was different, but you hadn’t noticed any of it. He had done everything he could to bring the attention of someone, someone out there who would undoubtedly come closer to understand what was happening and satisfy their lust for answers. Furthermore, Ben knew that there was absolutely no risk for you to be hurt. You would be scared, stressed and panicked, but hurt, never. He would not allowed that. Your abductor would certainly want to torture you, to get answers, maybe threaten you, but in the end, you would be safe. And to make sure of it, Ben wanted to find you, he wanted to be the only one to know where you were and what was happening to you, and soon, he would be by your side without you knowing it. </p>
<p>An hour in his researches and Ben had finally found you. You weren’t far. And you weren’t alone. You were lying down on rocks while your abductor was crouching near the river, joining hands to pick up some water to drink. Ben knelt in the plants and stared at Danielle’s slim body. He really was impressed that she had managed to carry you all the way across the forest. He small cruel grin appeared on his face, then his eyes moved down at you. You still were asleep. Not due to the trauma. Danielle had certainly knocked you out at soon as you were out of the station. His eyes moved to your belly. Your baby bump was hidden by the layer of clothes over you, though if you moved too much, Danielle would notice it, if she hadn’t already. For now, the French woman seemed calmed, determined, cold blooded. Though Ben had always been quite sick of her fate, loosing her mind all alone on this Island, he still admired the stubbornness she showed. Though this stubbornness, Alex had inherited it. Danielle would probably bring you back to her camp. He would only have to follow you there. </p>
<p>___</p>
<p>You blinked. Your eyes opened on the clear sky beyond the leafs on the trees. There was a cold wind swishing to your ears. You blinked again, you didn’t quite see what was around you, nor did you remember what happened. But then a strong ache at the back of your head joined the hum in your ears, you remembered the strong pain in your belly and the panic that had overflowed you, the fire, the dark, and Ben falling to the ground. You remembered the feeling of a hand closing on your wrist and pulling you out of the room, the fingers digging down in your skin as you tried to escape this grip, the echo of Ethan’s voice in the corridor and the shock of something smashing the back of your head. Apparently, the contractions you had felt were nothing but the expression of your fear. Luckily. Hopefully. You almost didn’t feel any pain any more. You moved your head around and slowly started to see more than blurry shapes and you heard the light sound of water flowing nearby. Under your hands, you recognised the sensations of small pebbles and the smell of the trees. You were in the forest, but where, with whom, why and how did you get here ? You had absolutely no idea. </p>
<p>You slowly moved your body up and shook your hands while taking a deep breath, when suddenly you heard a metallic clicking sound behind you. </p>
<p>“ Do not move. “ A voice. A feminine voice. A voice you did not know. You tried to focus to analyse the situation but a rope jumped on your knees. <br/>“ Tie it around your wrists. “ You did as you were asked, not talking, still too weak to do anything anyway. You felt a hand pulling you up to put you on your feet, your head was still too dizzy to function properly. <br/>“ Can you walk ? “ You didn’t respond but softly nodded. You felt the tip of a rifle between your shoulder blades, your palm instantly turned sweaty. “ Then walk. “</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. His silence</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ben followed you to Rousseau's camp. Until now he had a vague idea of where it was located but didn't know with certainty. Thankfully it was far away from the village, she wouldn't accidentally come through the gate. As his blue eyes scanned your surroundings, he noticed that the French woman was equiped with some kind of electricity source. How resourceful. She certainly exploited the current coming from the Mirror. He'd have to check this later but the girls were not allowed to come back to the surface just yet. For now, Ben focused on Danielle. He made sure that her gun would not fire on you, and for that, he had carried his own gun during the whole voyage. He had been more silent than ever, stepping in your footprints so he wouldn't be noticed nor heard. He watched Danielle putting you down on your knees and smashing your head once again so you'd faint. Ben boiled inside; she wouldn't kill you but she had knocked you out two times already this morning. This would leave traces. But he had to let her do so, so his plan would evolve. He watched Danielle tying you to a camp bed... but his plan somehow changed as soon as Danielle discovered your baby bump. At first the French woman was shocked, surprised... But soon she became curious and quite quickly she felt tears in her eyes. From the bush he was hiding in, Ben could hear her sobbing. But he didn't react. Feelings weren't his best quality. He kept on watching her with his usual stone cold face. </p>
<p>He walked away from the camp for few steps and called Ethan with his walkie talkie.<br/>" Ethan ? Do you copy ? "<br/>" Yes Ben, I can hear you. "<br/>" Are you back at the village ? "<br/>" Not yet. "<br/>" Listen, when you'll get back, you'll tell Goodwin that I've been to temple with [Y/N]. "<br/>" The temple ? Ben- "<br/>" Just do it. If everything happens the way I planned them, I'll join Richard there in a couple of days. Tell him as well. "<br/>" What about Dogen and Lennon ? "<br/>" They'll open the gate when I'll get there with Richard. Everyone must be ready. "<br/>" Ben... Are you sure about what you're doing ? "<br/>" ... Have faith in Jacob, Ethan. Over. "</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben walked back to the camp and laid low, watching the French woman. She looked confused but she wouldn't be a threat to you. Once again, he rubbed his bump and drank some water. Now, the obseravtion would begin. </p>
<p>_______</p>
<p>You woke up a few hours later, dehydrated and with a bad headache. You blinked and tried to sit up but you were tied down. You took deep breaths and sighed. You really were getting sick and worried of this situation now. You turned your head and saw a slim silhouette sitting a bit further, holding a long thing in her hand; a gun. There was your abductor. You kept your eyes on her but remained silent. One thing you learned from Ben is that silence is a very valuable asset when trapped in a bad situation. You slowly started to hear a low hum, but it wasn't due to the shock like a few hours before. It was like someone whispering... You focused... and could slowly distinguish a light voice, a feminine voice talking low... " weale " " weless " " wuelaless " " wuealex". It was her, whispering some ghiberish. You stared at her silently, hoping to find a solution to get out of this trap. While thinking about your situation, you remembered your first day on the Island, the arrival... You remembered your thoughts on your way to Ethan's. This was the French woman, it was her, of course! You opened your mouth wide and the French woman got on her feet and walked to you. </p>
<p>She leaned on you and looked into your eyes then down at your belly. She pulled up your shirt to show your naked skin. <br/>" You're on of them, aren't you ? " she said. You didn't reply. She looked up at you and placed a hand on your belly, that made you shiver. " How long ? " <br/>You just stared at her as an answer, softly shifting under her hand. " You should rest. We will talk later. "<br/>She walked back to her seat and grabbed her rifle, certainly to clean it. And you went back looking at the sky.<br/>A few hours later, she came back to you, asking quetions that you did not answer. She concluded this talk by saying: " Soon enough you'll have to talk if you want to drink. " <br/>The night  fell soon enough. You could barely see anything now. The wind still was blowing softly? The French woman lit up a small lamp. You wondered why she was here, living alone in the forest. What was her story, and why she was treated differently from you. What did she do to deserve such treatment ? But this was a story you wouldn't find the answer to today.  You fell asleep, worrying about you and about Ben. The following day, the French woman had seem to loose her patience. She had waken you up quite early and had pointed her gun to your face, asking the same questions, but still no answer. You trembed with fear and started to think that you might not make it out alive. The clouds filled above your head, one of those tropical storms. But the woman didn't flinch. She stared at you, showing her teeth.</p>
<p>"  WUEALEX ? " <br/>The rain started pouring heavily on both of you, raindrops fell on her long untidy hair, falling down on her cheeks... And then you realised they weren't raindrops. They were tears.<br/>" Where is Alex... "</p>
<p>Alex...</p>
<p>The rain stopped. The French woman turned her head around and stood still. A few minutes. Immobile... wind blew... Suddenly, she walked to her table and grabbed a large knife and walked back to you, putting a hand on your belly. But she didn't look like she was wanting to attack you, she looked like she was in a rush, trying to do something. She looked into your eyes and talked to you hurridly:<br/>" Soon I guess... " she paused and looked around her. " Don't let them take him from you. Don't- " she stopped as the wind blew in the leaves, carrying whispers with them. She garbbed her rifle and walked out of the camp. You rose your head and watched around you for a way to break these links but you were too tied up and too tired to do anything. You moved your feet a little and felt your belly contracting again. 'Not now' you repeated to yourself. Thanfully, these bad contractions weren't quite a sign of delivery. You kept on shaking your limbs in all senses, hoping to get free but nothing changed. You were desperatly thirsty and yet trapped on this bed. You moved your body once more but the bed lost its balance with you and you fell down, still tied. first your arm and your leg but ultimatly, it was the baby bump that slowed your fall. You felt a strong pain rushing through your body, your breath cut short and you panted, moaned loudly while your teeth ground together, followed by a muffled scream. </p>
<p>Never before had you felt such pain, you started crying while still trying to bring your arms to your body but couldn't move, screams of despair followed the cries and soon you saw the French woman emerging from the bushes, but you coudln't distinguish anything that was happening, your eyes were too filled with tears, tears for this agonising rush of pain coursing through your body.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. His strength</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Warning: graphic depiction of pain and blood mention. <br/>If you don’t want to read, there’s note at the end of the chapter that sums up the story.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ben watched you from the bushes. He kept a very attentive eye on Danielle while she rushed to you. She dropped her weapon on the side and grabbed back her knife to free you from your ties. Everything was going according to plan so far. Ethan was by Ben’s side in his temple’s uniform, Richard was on the other side of the bushes with Tom and four other persons, all whispering. They all watched the French woman laying you down on the ground and trying to calm you while you were desperately screaming. </p>
<p>“ Ben, you can’t let that happen, she can’t give birth in the forest. “<br/>“ She’s not. We’re taking her out of here as soon as Danielle takes the baby. “<br/>“ She could die. “<br/>“ I won’t let that happen. “</p>
<p>___</p>
<p>You screamed loudly while rolling on the sides, the woman tried to pin you down by the wrists but she couldn’t keep you still. You felt all the nerves of your body contracting but these looked nothing like the contractions you had before, the pain was clear and intense through your muscles and a very strong back pain tensed your body. Your teeth were grinding together while your pain whistled between them. </p>
<p>You felt the French woman’s hand on your belly, it was cold, the other one rested on your forehead. Her face certainly showed panic but you couldn’t speak, you could only pant; but your pain slowly mixed with fear when she stopped moving and just stared at your pants, soaking wet, but not because of the rain. She looked at you with her eyes wide open, her jaw dropped. You opened your mouth to speak but a wave of pain shook your body. </p>
<p>The French woman shifted her position and grabbed your waist, unbuckled your belt and grabbed your pants. You tried to stop her but you couldn’t move, your muscles were completely paralysed, and she pulled down your pants in one move. The rain poured heavier on both of you, yet you could see blood on the French woman’s hands. And she didn’t hurt you. This was the baby. You tried to calm down but you couldn’t imagine yourself giving birth in the mud and you started crying with despair. </p>
<p>The woman moved between your legs and tried to check on you but you pulled your knees back both by modesty and because you thought that might help you keeping the baby in a little longer. Your face was covered in rain and mud and tears, you almost couldn’t feel your jaw anymore because of how tight your teeth were clenched, and most of all this pain that rushed down in your body. You almost felt like your strength were leaving your body but the pain kept you awake, like a battery. </p>
<p>The French woman yelled something at you but you couldn’t understand a word, she was holding your thighs up and slowly applying pressure on your belly but that wouldn’t change anything. After a few minutes that felt like an eternity to you, you felt her backing off to take her knife, you tried to sit up but your muscles kept you down, groaning like an animal; she plunged the metal in the fire and placed a hand on your belly, but all you could do was scream loudly as she moved the blade close to your skin. </p>
<p>You saw the knife plunging under your flesh, a long and agonising movement that was followed with a lot of blood coming out of the wound, you tried to grip anything to keep yourself up but found nothing, you tried to push her back with your feet but your were too weak; you managed to kick her arm back but this insured in more pain when the blade moved back in the wound, your throat was hurting and a disgusting taste of iron got in the back of your throat and you really started to feel yourself leaving your body when the French woman sunk her hand inside the wide wound, reaching inside of you, moving your bowels around, “maybe it would feel better to give up” you thought, and the pain slowly started to wrap you in its arms while all you could see were blurry shapes, the woman above you with her arms covered in blood, holding something in her arms. </p>
<p>A gunshot, a silhouette, and then, </p>
<p>nothing.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>THIS IS NOT THE ENDING. </p>
<p>IF YOU DIDNT READ THE CHAPTER because of the warning: You’re giving birth and Danielle tries to get the baby, according to Ben’s plan but you’re on the verge of dying, the last thing you hear is a gunshot.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. His choice</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ben jumped out from the bushes and joined you while the others grabbed Danielle and fired their guns to scare her, but the French woman tried to defend herself, she would not get robbed from this baby too, not by them, and she screamed for them to let her go! But the only thing Ben focused on was you, he held you in his arms and saw the large wound under your navel. </p>
<p>“ Richard ! Richard help me ! ” The tall man ran to him while Ethan knelt near you. <br/>“ Ben, she’s loosing too much blood- “<br/>“ I know Ethan, we must take her to the temple now ! “<br/>“ Ben, I’m not sure she’ll survive the trip. “ Richard said. <br/>“ Then you’d Ben run very fast unless you want It to take her. “</p>
<p>Richard frowned; Danielle screamed and scratched Tom’s face and as Ben turned his to see what happened, Danielle kicked him with his boots and a large spit of blood escaped Ben’s mouth. </p>
<p>“ Go now! “ he said while getting on his feet. “ Let her go, the baby won’t survive anyway. “<br/>“ Ben you can’t leave the baby here. “<br/>“ It’s a baby Richard. It won’t do anything to it. Let’s go ! “</p>
<p>Richard carried you in his arms while Ethan pressed a towel against your wound, thank God you couldn’t feel anything. Ben ran with them, leaving Tom and the team behind with Danielle and the baby. The three men rushed to a buggy nearby and jumped into it, Richard drove while Ethan and Ben held you. The surgeon was loosing his trust in his hands as they got covered in blood, he couldn’t do anything that could help you and he started panicking. </p>
<p>“ Ethan, focus. “<br/>“ I’m trying to Ben-“ the buggy jumped and he fell over, he moved back over your body. “What if we can’t save her. “<br/>“ We will- “<br/>“ What if we can’t ? We’ve never tried this before. “ Ethan said. Ben turned his head and watched Richard in the reflection of the rearview mirror. Richard watched him back and kept on driving. <br/>“ It will work. And she will be one of us. For ever. “<br/>“ What about the baby ? It will die- “<br/>“ So ? “<br/>“ How can you be so heartless ? “<br/>“ I’m doing what I must do to protect this Island. You should know what it means Ethan, you too did things you condemn. We’re saving [Y/N] and if it works, we will know that women can have babies on the Island. “<br/>“ If it implies to sacrifice them. “<br/>“ Some sacrifices are inevitable. “</p>
<p>They arrived at the temple, Ben walked by Richard’s side who was holding you, Ethan ran ahead to tell Dogen and Lennon that you were here. Richard looked at Ben while pushing on the large stone door. </p>
<p>“ Ben. You know what it means, what you’re asking me- “<br/>“ I know Richard. “<br/>“ If I do that she will never be able to leave the Island ever again. “<br/>“ I know. “<br/>“ She won’t be the same. “<br/>“ I’d rather have her here forever by my side than eaten by that thing. “ he placed two fingers on your neck. “ Talking of which you’d better hurry because I can’t feel her pulse no more. “</p>
<p>Dogen rushed in yelling in Japanese “ Kokode wa arimasen! Kokode wa arimasen !” And Ben to answer: “ Saisho ni kanojo o sukue! “ Everyone rushed in the temple to place an ash barrier while Richard ran inside with Lennon, he stared at you in his arms, praying that it wouldn’t be too late. He rushed to the small basin and already started to emerge himself when Lennon told him that they had to wait for Dogen. </p>
<p>“ I’ve taught Dogen how to proceed, he won’t be of any help. “</p>
<p>And with these words Richard plunged in the water with you. He held your body under water, closing his eyes while Lennon turned around the hourglass. Dogen ran inside and saw Richard, he protested the best he could but Ben held him back, to what the Japanese man punched Ben, another hit that didn’t make him flinch but Ben grabbed his baton and smacked Dogen’s knee to put him down. He threw his bag aside and stood on the side of the pool, his blue eyes wide open to watch you heal, be cured, Lennon kept on watching the hourglass then Richard until the very last grain of sand fell down. Richard jumped up on his feet while blowing the water off his mouth and pulled you out of the pool. He held your body up the stairs and laid you down on the stone floor, Ben moved to join your side and watched your face then your wound. He placed his firm hands on your flesh, no pulse. </p>
<p>He sat back and looked at Richard silently. Richard looked at him back, then you, then walked out of the temple. </p>
<p>___</p>
<p>Water drop, an echo. A tingling feeling in your fingers. Fire crackling. A smell of wet stone. </p>
<p>You opened your eyes.</p>
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<a name="section0021"><h2>21. Through the Island’s bluest eyes</h2></a>
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    <p>You slowly sat on the cold stone. Where were you ? You didn’t know this place, you’ve never been here before. It looked like a very old building, according to the moss that had started to grow over the walls. A water basin... an hourglass. You looked down at yourself and saw a large wound under your navel. But you couldn’t remember what was the cause of it. You didn’t remember anything at all of what happened -before-.</p>
<p>You did your best to get on your feet but they were weak. Plus, the light was very low, you barely saw where you were going, the only help you had were the torches on the wall. You walked to one of them and took it. It was way heavier than you expected. But who cared? You had to find someone, quick. You followed what seems to be a corridor and hears some noise emanating from what seemed to be a court. You passed your head between two columns and saw people gathering outside. No familiar faces. None except for Richard. The Spanish man turned his head as he saw you and parted his lips in surprise. A man with Asian features turned around, followed by a man with curled hair. You frowned softly. </p>
<p>The Asian man started to walk to you, and you weren’t sure of what you should do, but he just walked pass you, followed by the other man. You watched them walking away and heard a familiar voice calling you. </p>
<p>“ [Y/N] ? “ you turned your head to see Richard walking to you. “ How do you feel ? “<br/>“ I’m not sure. What should I be feeling ? “ Richard eyes moved down to the scar on your belly. <br/>“ What do you remember ? “<br/>“ About what ? “<br/>“ About what happened before you were brought here. “ you stared at him silently. “ Do you know where you are ? “<br/>“ No. “ silence. Then- “ where’s Ben ? “<br/>“ Ben is... somewhere around. “<br/>“ Call him in. I need to see him. “ Richard looked down at you with some kind of sadness then turned around and grabbed his walkie talkie. <br/>“ Ben, Richard here, do you copy ? “<br/>“ Ben, I copy. “<br/>“ [Y/N]’s awake. She wants to see you. “ silence. <br/>“ Coming. “ Richard turned his radio off and looked at you. “ Give me that. “ he took the torch you were holding and guided you by the shoulders through the large court covered in leaves and plants to a large wooden door. He stopped you before some kind of ashes and talked with the guards. A few minutes later, Ben appeared on the other side. </p>
<p>His face was very hard to see because of the cracking fire but you could distinguish numerous scars and bumps on his face. He didn’t seem disturb by them and frankly neither were you. You stared at him and he stared back at you. He walked above the ashes and stood right in front of you. <br/>“ Good evening [Y/N]. “<br/>“ Good evening, Benjamin. “<br/>He frowned softly then remained as silent as before. You watched him with a small grin. <br/>“ Where have you been ? “<br/>“ Searching for answers. “<br/>“ Did you find them ? “<br/>“ Mostly, yes. “ he looked at Richard rapidly then took a step closer and placed a hand on your back while the two guards closed the doors. “ Come with me. “</p>
<p>You followed him silently, leaving Richard alone in the courtyard. Ben walked to a place, far from curious minds, not lit, no nothing. Only some cold stones and the reflection of the moon. Away, you could watch the court filled with torches and Richard walking through it like a small ant. You turned to watch Ben. His face was low but he still was staring at you. You walked to him, grabbed his shirt and kissed him furiously, pressing your lips on his, tasting the iron-like taste of blood from his scars, holding his hair in your hand whilst your body pressed tighter and tighter against him. </p>
<p>Ben took a deep breath and pushed you back, you were still close enough to feel his breath on your skin but not close enough to touch him. Even though you tried to get closer, his grip was too firm on your wrists for you to move. You never suspected even for a second that he was so strong. A smile grew on your face, like some kind of desire for a challenge. If you couldn’t kiss him, you’d tease him in another way. You moved your thigh between his legs and started to rub your leg against his crotch. He groaned softly but moved you around, turned your body away and trapped you between his body and the stone wall. </p>
<p>“ Still, there’s one thing I don’t understand... “<br/>“ Tell me. “<br/>“ How can you be alive after four days spent in the coma without any medical assistance. “ <br/>You chuckled before looking at him. <br/>“ Where’s your faith in the Island, Ben ? “<br/>He turned you around and looked into your eyes. <br/>“ I know you’re not It. I’ve been chasing it for the past few days. But why are you so... different ? “<br/>“ Commitment tastes very differently from freedom Ben. “ you looked into his eyes. “ Maybe you liked me better when I was soft and curious ? “<br/>“ You can’t change overnight. “<br/>“ No. But I’ve been out for four days. “<br/>You grinned and grabbed his belt. He held your throat firmly in his hand and looked into your eyes but he didn’t know what to say, for the first time, you were the one behind the curtain. </p>
<p>You moved back against the warmth of his body and kissed him, more gently, letting his lips parting so you could feel to tip of his tongue against your teeth. Your hands moved up to his shirt that you unbuttoned, one by one while his hands settled on your arms, cupping your shoulders, pulling you closer. But as your hands reached his pants, he pushed your body against the stone wall, and presses you against his. He looked into your eyes and moved your hair aside, just so he could move his hips back. You lost no time and pulled him out of his pants and his hips let you guide him to your entrance. </p>
<p>It was so easy for him to penetrate you. Slowly at first, as if it was the first time. And in a sense, it was. You saw him pressing his sweaty forehead against the stone, you body framed by his two hands and your legs crossed on his hips. His cock slid up inside of you, deep down, until he could no longer push in. The Island never sounded so quiet. You heard Ben exhaling and as the wind got up, he pumped up in you, once, twice, and as the wind blew stronger Ben dug faster in you, slamming your body against the stone wall, making a thumping noise with each thrust, but you held tight unto him and moaned with pleasure in his ear, holding tight upon his shirt, begging for more without even having to speak-</p>
<p>An alarm sound resonated in the forest. You couldn’t see anything but some some flashes between the trees, it was moving. Ben stopped moving in you and turned his head to watch the thing moving through the trees, he remained silent, staring at that thing as it went away. You watched Ben with soft eyes as he turned his head around to look at you. Some kind of surprise was printed on his face mixed with incomprehension. He looked at your body and your scar then away. You grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him close to kiss him, tenderly this time, softly, gently, and his hands wrapped around your ass, pulling you up. </p>
<p>Your muscles clenched around his swollen cock and he gasped softly, he started to move in you again at a slower pace but the tip of his cock brushed delicately yet so pleasantly the right spots in you, slower but better as this delicious friction gave you goosebumps, goosebumps as you felt his fingers digging in your thighs, and your nails plunging in the skin of his neck, and you could feel his precum leaking in you. The sensation of his breath against your lips never felt better than at this instant, his warm tongue teasing your mouth and you excited him as you moaned against his mouth, his blue eyes reflecting the light of the torches, his desire burning for you; he held you tight against him and with a few deeper and harder strokes, you felt him spilling in you, filling you whole with his cum and you moaned as you felt your own orgasm closing around him, your head pressed back on the cold stone. </p>
<p>You let Ben’s head buried between your breasts as your chest moved up and down to help you calm down from this rush of pleasure. Ben also was breathing against your skin and pulled out from you and zipped his pants up. You watched him walking back but then suddenly grabbed him and pulled him to you. </p>
<p>“ Now Benjamin Linus, how the turntables. “</p>
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